How To Train Your Mutant
by Chavonnie26
Summary: First of my parodies. When the X-Men get roped into doing a parody of How To Train Your Dragon by unstable yet very powerful mutant insanity ensues. Definite ROMY
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I don't own X-Men Evolution or How To Train Your Dragon. If I did I wouldn't be writing this.**

* * *

"Hellooo X-Men and Brotherhood and welcome to my version of How to Train your Dragon." A fifteen year old girl with shoulder blade length brown hair, pale skin that was only slightly tanned, dark brown eyes behind thick purple glasses and a devilish smirk says in an almost American accent greeting everyone in a soundstage that seemed to go on forever.

The girl is wearing a brown cowboy hat, a black t-shirt that says 'Rogue Rebel' in bright blue letters under a blue open button down long sleeve shirt with the sleeves rolled up to her elbows, dark blue jeggings which hug her figure, brown boots that reach her knees and a pair of black gloves. Overall she looks like a country girl but something about the way she held herself suggested that she had quite a bit of power. Considering the fact that she managed to get both the X-Men and the Brotherhood into the same room without any fighting I'd say she has quite a bit of power.

"Who are you?" Magneto asks clearly distrusting of the girl partially due to the fact he thought she was a human.

"Name's Chavonnie26 and since you're wondering yes I technically am a mutant in a very loose sense of the word." The girl says as her eyes flash blue and the sound stage they are in transforms into a Viking village on an island.

Everyone looks around in somewhat awe before Chavonnie26 disappears in a flash of blue light. Everyone is confused until they are enveloped in a flash of blue light and the movie begins with a select few people being turned into dragons.

* * *

We skim above a dark, wild ocean. The camera turns toward a lone island, New York. It is a gigantic shard of rock jutting straight out of the water covered in greenery that Chavonnie26 had way too much fun with.

"This is New York. It's twelve days North of hopeless, and a few degrees South of freezing to death. It's located solidly on the meridian of misery." Rogue says in a voice over Chavonnie's powers were kind enough to provide.

We drift over rolling hills to reveal a small village nestled on an outcropping of sea mounts. All the houses look like Viking homes but if you looked closely you could see some hints of African designs.

"My village. In a word, sturdy. And it's been here for seven generations, but every single building is new." Rogue continues as we drift closer circling the village.

"We have fishing, hunting, and a charming view of the sunsets. The only problems are the pests. You see, most places have mice or mosquitos. We have..." Rogue says as we shift over to some sheep grazing peacefully on a hillside. Suddenly one is snatched.

We quickly cut to the inside of one of the homes as a door is pulled open... and a dragon swoops directly toward it, blasting fire. The door is slammed shut. The fire shoots through the slats of wood, illuminating Rogue dressed as a teenage Viking with her hair in a ponytail. Her outfit matches Hiccup's from the original movie down to the letter as most of the outfits in the production do. Rogue is also wearing a pair of gloves.

"...dragons." Rogue gulps trying not to set her outfit on fire.

She soon reopens the sizzling door, as leaps off of the front porch. She weaves through the erupting mayhem as Vikings (Some poor extras, X-Men and Brotherhood members tricked into playing cannon fodder) pour out of the buildings, ready for a fight. More dragons swarm in, setting rooftops alight and hauling off sheep that will soon be used to cook Chavonnie's Christmas meal for her family. (I have a big family)

"Most people would leave. Not us. We're Vikings. We have stubbornness issues." Rogue says in a voice over again as the Vikings sound the alarm.

Viking men and women pour out into the streets, axes in hand. During this Rogue is darting through alleys, staying under eaves, making her way through the battle surprisingly not getting hurt.

"My name's Rogue. Great name, I know. But it's not the worst. Parents believe a hideous name will frighten off gnomes and trolls. Like our charming Viking demeanour wouldn't do that." Rogue says still in her voice over as dragons sweep back and forth, dodging axes and blasting the Vikings who throw them. A burly warrior gets tossed in an explosion, knocking Rogue to the ground.

"Arggghhhhh!" the Viking yells furiously before giving Rogue a cheery almost insane, "Mornin'!"

Rogue gets to her feet and continues to rush past gigantic men and women trying not to be stepped upon.

"Meet the neighbours. Hank the Genius..." Rogue says still in voice over as we wonder if she'll ever talk normally.

"What are you doing out!?" Beast asks trying not to get killed.

" ... Bobby the Clown..." Rogue voice overs.

"Get inside!" Bobby yells tossing an axe covered in ice at a dragon.

"... Jubilee the Firecracker..."

"Get back inside!" Jubilee yells more concerned for her health than Rogue's as she fires some of her fireworks at a dragon.

"... Colossus…"

Rogue passes a silent ox of a Viking, completely covered in steel skin.

"Yep, just Colossus."

Now enters everyone's favourite aggressive mutant, Wolverine, the shortest yet toughest Viking of all. He yanks Rogue from the path of a strafing dragon and holds aloft to the crowd.

"Rogue!? What is she doing out again?!" Wolverine asks the crowd angrily slightly shaking Rogue despite him being shorter than her.

"What are you doing out?! Get inside!" Wolverine yells as the flames light up his scowling face and side burns.

He sets Rogue down and turns to the sky, searching.

"That's Logan the Wolverine. Chief of the tribe. They say that when he was a baby he popped a dragon's head clean off of its shoulders with his claws. Do I believe it?" Rogue asks in a voice over her voice filled with awe.

Wolverine grabs a wooden cart and hurls it, knocking the strafing dragon out of the sky.

"Yes I do." (I really don't blame her)

An explosion forces Vikings to duck. Wolverine stands firm, brushing flaming debris off of his shoulder. Wow now that was cool. (I agree.)

"What have we got?" Wolverine barks to the terrified extras

"Blobs. Spykes. ShadowCrawlers. Oh, and Hank saw a Monstrous Pyro." One of the extras says knowing that Chavonnie was watching with her hand on the button for the shock collars.

"Any Rebels?" Wolverine asks hoping the answer was no.

"None so far." The extra says as Wolverine relaxes ever so slightly.

"Good." Wolverine says relived.

"Hoist the torches!" one of the Vikings yell as massive flaming braziers are raised on poles, lighting up the night sky... and revealing swirling dragons of all types.

Below, Rogue crosses an open plaza and ducks into an open building with a tall chimney. She crosses behind a counter, where a peg-legged, one-armed Forge reshapes blades with a hammer and tongs appendage.

"Ah! Nice of you to join the party. I thought you'd been carried off." Forge says as Rogue dons a leather apron and starts to put away Forge's scattered appendages.

"Who me? Nah, come on! I'm way too muscular for their taste. They wouldn't know what to do with all this." Rogue says as she strikes a bodybuilder pose.

"They need toothpicks, don't they?" Forge asks clearly not impressed. (Either that or something to make stew with.)

Rogue gets to work, transferring bent and chipped weapons to the forge as Vikings crowd the counter for replacements.

"The moron with attitude and interchangeable hands is Forge. I've been his apprentice ever since I was little. Well...littler."

"We move to the lower defences. We'll counter-attack with the catapults." Wolverine says planning a counter-attack with his men outside.

Armed men rush past, flanking others who carry sheep to safety. Wolverine follows up the rear as, overhead; a dragon strafes the rooftops with Napalm-like fire.

"See? Old village. Lots and lots of new houses."(Ain't that the truth.)

"FIRE!" A Viking screams and in response, the fire brigade charges through the plaza - four teens, tugging a large wooden cask on wheels.

From it, they fill buckets of water to douse the flames. One among them is a handsome, red-on-black eyed Viking male. Rogue leans out of the stall to watch him as Chavonnie and all the other Gambit fans do the same but not covering up the fact that they were staring. A few were even drooling at the sight of Remy in a skin tight shirt. Remy's outfit was the same as Astrid's from the movie minus the band around his head and the skirt. (Must resist urge to squeal.)

"Oh and that's Scott, Jean, the twins Wanda and Pietro. And..." Rogue voice overs as we get a close up shot of each teen as their name is mentioned.

"Remy." Rogue says dreamily as a slow-motion explosion erupts behind Remy, framing him in a sexy ball of fire getting thousands of fangirls to squeal. The others join him, looking awesome and heroic.

"Their job is so much cooler." (I have to agree with you on that one.)

Rogue tries to join them as they pass, but she's hooked by Forge and hoisted back inside.

"Ah, come on. Let me out, please. I need to make my mark." Rogue begs sounding very much unlike the grouchy girl we all know. (Really? Cause I know her as a Southern Firecracker who always calls Gambit Swamp Rat. Oh right that's comics. This is Evo.)

"Oh, you've made plenty of marks. All in the wrong places." Forge says and it's true. (Yup and I got the scars to prove it. Please don't hit me. *Rogue reluctantly puts down the crowbar she was about to strike with*)

"Please, two minutes. I'll kill a dragon. My life will get infinitely better. I might even get a date." Rogue pleads and I think we all know who she wants to ask out.

"You can't lift a hammer. You can't swing an axe..." Forge lists as he grabs a bola (iron balls connected by rope for those who don't know).

"... you can't even throw one of these." Forge says as a Viking runs by and nabs it out of his hand, hurling it at a dive-bombing Blob. The bola binds its legs, sending it into a heavy crash.

"Okay fine, but..." Rogue says as she rushes to the back corner of the stall and presents a bizarre, wheel barrow-like contraption that Chavonnie probably put together on the fly, "... this will throw it for me."

Rogue opens the hinged lid of the device. An arm springs up, equipped with twin bows. They prematurely launch a bola, narrowly missing Forge... and taking out a Viking at the counter.

"Arggh!" the Viking shouts tangled in the bolas.

"See, now this right here is what I'm talking about." Forge says and here I was thinking that it was Rogue's powers. (I was thinking that too.)

"Mild calibration issue." Rogue says already getting to work fixing her machine.

"Rogue. If you ever want to get out there to fight dragons, you need to stop all..." Forge says gesturing in Rogue's general direction, "... this."

"But... you just pointed to all of me." Rogue says a little confused and insulted.

"Yes! That's it! Stop being all of you." Forge says glad that Rogue got it so quickly.

"Ohhhh..." Rogue says trying to be threatening but failing epically.

"Ohhhhh, yes." Forge mimics as getting a few laughs.

"You, sir, are playing a dangerous game. Keeping this much, raw...Vikingness contained." Rogue says sounding oh so awkward and then pauses before saying, "There will be consequences!"

Forge tosses her a sword which she stumbles to catch. (Not so tough without your powers are ya? *Notices a fully powered Rogue behind her* Uh forget I said anything. *Goes unconscious as Rogue drains her but springs right back up again* Ha nice try but no.)

"I'll take my chances. Sword. Sharpen. Now." Forge says as Rogue takes it begrudgingly and lobs it onto the grinding wheel.

Rogue stews... fantasizing... (Five bucks says she's thinking about Gambit *sees Rogue behind her with a crowbar again* Forget I said anything.)

"One day I'll get out there. Because killing a dragon is everything around here." Rogue voice overs as we see a bunch of Spykes land, gathering like seagulls around a seemingly vacant house.

"A Spyke head is sure to get me at least noticed." (Really? *looks to see Evan sitting nearby talking to Kurt* Excuse me for a second *Evan and Kurt notice me coming and start to run* I'll get you my not so pretty and your little elf too! *chases after the two with a chainsaw*)

The Spykes clamber onto the building, tearing the roof and walls apart. Sheep pour out and scatter. Elsewhere, hippo-like Blobs pick drying racks clean of fish and fly off like loaded pelicans.

"Blobs are tough. Taking down one of those would definitely get me a boyfriend." (Thanks for the tip! *Fred starts running as well leaving big dents in the floor*)

A stealthy, pink snake-like dragon head peeks over a rooftop, breathing gas into a chimney.

"A ShadowCrawler? Exotic, exciting. Two heads, twice the status." (Get back here you little pink wearing pixie! *chases after Kitty as well as the others now sporting a flamethrower as well* Ah forget it. *sits down nearby panting as the cast find places to hide*)

A second blue head pokes through the door and lights it. KABLAM! The two heads fly through the explosion, their necks zipping together to reveal a single duel coloured body. It flies past Wolverine as he climbs to the top of a catapult tower.

"They found the sheep!" the catapult operator says stating the obvious.

"Concentrate fire over the lower bank!" Wolverine yells frustrated as his claws peek through his skin.

"Fire!" the catapult operator orders as boulders are catapulted at the corralling Spykes...

Just as a huge red and orange dragon whips past, spraying the base of the catapult with sticky fire.

"And then there's the Monstrous Pyro. Only the best Vikings go after those. They have this nasty habit of setting themselves on fire." (Something tells me Pyro isn't gonna be happy I called him monstrous *Looks to see Pyro holding a flame thrower behind her* I was right *Runs like the Flash away from the flames before attacking back with her own flamethrower*)

It emerges from the flames, climbing the catapult with a leering, toothy grin. It seems to enjoy all the flames.

"Reload! I'll take care of this." Wolverine orders his claws coming out.

Wolverine takes on the Pyro, face to claws. Suddenly, loud ballistic moaning streaks overhead. The catapult crew ducks as we zoom back to Rogue. Rogue, looking up from her work, reacts to the same sound.

"But the ultimate prize is the dragon no one has ever seen. We call it the—"

"Rebel! Get down!" A Viking yells as Vikings everywhere take shelter. The moaning sound builds.

The Monstrous Pyro Wolverine was fighting suddenly stops fighting and takes flight. Wolverine looks skyward.

"JUMP!" Wolverine orders and the crew rush to do as he says.

KABOOM! The Catapult explodes as though hit by an artillery shell... sending Wolverine and the crew leaping for their lives.

"This thing never steals food, never shows itself, and..."

The sound recedes, leaving the crippled catapult in flames.

"...never misses. (Wait for a beat) No one has ever killed a Rebel. That's why I'm going to be the first." (Good luck with that.)

Back in the stall Forge trades his hammer for an axe.

"Man the fort, Rogue, they need me out there!" Forge shouts before pausing and turning with a threatening glare.

"Stay. Put. There. You know what I mean." Forge says before he charges into the fray, hollering.

Meanwhile, a smirk crosses Rogue's face. The same smirk most teenagers get when they plan to disobey their parents. WHAM! Rogue pushes her wheeled contraption through a wall of clustered Vikings. She weaves through the on-going mayhem, as fast as her legs can carry her.

"Rogue, where are you going?!" A Viking asks off screen.

"Come back here!" A different Viking yells at Rogue.

"I know. Be right back!" Rogue shouts as we shift to the plain below.

The Spykes have cornered the house-full of sheep. They close in, ready to spring upon them. Wolverine suddenly appears, hurling fishing nets over them. The surprised Spykes are caught. Wolverine and his men rush in. A Spyke blasts a hole through its net. Wolverine leaps onto it, clamping his thick arms around its head, forcing its jaws shut.

"Mind yourselves! The devils still have some juice in them." Wolverine yells as we shift back to Rogue.

Rogue reaches a cliff overlooking the smoking catapult and drops the handles to the ground. She cranks several levers, unfolding and then cocking the bowed arms of her contraption. She drops a bola onto a chamber and then pivots the weapon on a gimbal head toward the dark sky. She listens, with her eye pressed to the scope, hand poised on the trigger. She hears the Rebel approaching... and turns her aim to the defence tower. It closes in for the final strike, completely camouflaged in the night.

"Come on. Give me something to shoot at, give me something to shoot at." Rogue says to herself.

KABLAM! The tower topples. The blast of fire illuminates the dragon for a split second. Rogue pulls the trigger. KERTHUNK! The flexed arms snap forward, springing the weapon off the ground. The bola disappears into the sky, followed by a whack and a screech.

"Oh I hit it! Yes, I hit it! Did anybody see that?" Rogue asks surprised then elated.

Rogue's victory is short-lived however as a Monstrous Pyro appears, slithering up over the lip of the cliff.

"Except for you." Rogue says with an expression that shows she is clearly afraid.

Meanwhile Wolverine is holding down the netted Spykes. He hears a familiar holler and looks up to see...Rogue running through the plaza, screaming at the top of her lungs, with the Pyro fast on her heels. Alarmed, Wolverine abandons the Spykes and runs off.

"DO NOT let them escape!" Wolverine tells his men regarding the Spykes.

Meanwhile in the plaza Vikings scatter as Rogue dodges a near fatal blast. The Pyro's sticky, Napalm-like fire splashes up onto buildings, setting them alight much to the dragon's and Chavonnie's glee. Rogue ducks behind the last standing brazier - the only shelter available. The Pyro blasts it, spraying fire all around her. Rogue peers around the smouldering post. No sign of the Pyro. She turns back to find it leering at her, blocking her escape. It takes a deep breath. Rogue is finished. Suddenly, Wolverine leaps between them, tackling the Pyro to the ground. They tumble and wrestle, resuming their earlier fight. The Pyro tries to toast him, but only coughs up smoke.

"You're all out." Wolverine says as he smashes the Pyro repeatedly in the face, driving it away. It takes to the air and disappears. Winded, Wolverine turns to Rogue.

"Oh, and there's one more thing you need to know..." Rogue voice overs somewhat sheepishly.

The burnt brazier pole collapses, sending the massive iron basket crashing. It bounces down the hill, destroying as it goes and scattering the Vikings who were holding down the netted Spykes. The freed dragons escape... with several sheep in tow. (Ah the main course has arrived *puts on chef's apron and hat and picks up a cleaver* Excuse me for a moment.)

"Sorry, dad." Rogue says to a very miffed Wolverine and is it just me or is she suddenly very clumsy? (*while covered in sheep's blood* It's not just you. *wipes off blood before throwing towel to a very hungry Sabretooth*)

The escaped Spykes fly past with sheep in their clutches. The raid is over. The dragons have clearly won. The murmuring crowd eyes Wolverine, awaiting his response.

"Okay, but I hit a Rebel." Rogue says sheepishly trying to make things better.

Wolverine grabs Rogue by the back scruff of her collar and hauls her away, fuming with embarrassment. (Hey if I had a daughter this clumsy *motions to the Rogue damaged areas* I'd be embarrassed too.)

"It's not like the last few times, Dad. I mean I really actually hit it. You guys were busy and I had a very clear shot. It went down, just off Raven Point. Let's get a search party out there, before it—" Rogue says trying to get through to the very stubborn Wolverine.

"-STOP! Just...stop." Wolverine interrupts as he releases Rogue.

Everyone goes silent, staring expectantly.

"Every time you step outside disaster follows. Can you not see that I have bigger problems? Winter's almost here and I have an entire village to feed!" Wolverine shouts as Rogue looks around. All eyes are upon her. (This is sounding more and more like a family conversation in my household. Yeah turns out parents prefer you to play outside rather on a computer. Who knew?)

"Between you and me, the village could do with a little less feeding, don't ya think?" Rogue asks in a whisper as a few rotund Vikings stir self-consciously.

"This isn't a joke, Rogue!" Wolverine yells having had enough before saying exasperated, "Why can't you follow the simplest orders?" (Now this is really sounding like a conversation me and my dad might have)

"I can't stop myself. I see a dragon and I have to just... kill it, you know? It's who I am, Dad." Rogue says trying to explain her actions. (What I'm really looking for is the reason why she's so clumsy.)

"You are many things, Rogue. But a dragon killer is not one of them." Wolverine says completely disappointed in Rogue. (Ouch that has got to hurt.)

Rogue looks around to see many nods of agreement.

"Get back to the house." Wolverine says to Rogue before telling Forge, "Make sure she gets there. I have her mess to clean up."

Wolverine lumbers off in the opposite direction. Forge leads Rogue through the walk of shame. They pass the teen fire brigade as they snicker.

"Quite the performance." Pietro says sounding as if someone removed his brain and replaced it with a potato. (Wait wouldn't that suggest he had a brain in the first place?)

"I've never seen anyone mess up that badly." Jean says somehow losing her Miss-Perfect-ness and instead having the personality of your classic bully. (Oh that helped! Next time why not just shove her down a sandpaper slide? *Notices a lot of weird looks* My brother forced me to watch a lot of Iron Weasel okay?!)

"Thank you, thank you. I was trying, so..." Rogue says as she avoids Remy's glare and heads up toward a large house, standing prominently on the hill above the others.

"I really did hit one." Rogue says and I actually believe her. (Easy for you to say you're not tied up in ropes *struggles against a bunch of ropes before breaking loose* Haha nothing can hold me for long!)

"Sure, Rogue." Forge says not believing it for a second.

"He never listens." Rogue rants and who here actually expects Wolverine to listen. (Not me.)

"Well, it runs in the family." Forge says knowing that Rogue wasn't listening.

"And when he does, it's always with this... disappointed scowl. Like someone skimped on the meat in his sandwich or forgot his beer." Rogue says sounding a lot like Chavonnie26 when she rants about her dad before mimicking her dad by saying, "Excuse me, barmaid. I'm afraid you brought me the wrong offspring. I ordered an extra-large boy with beefy arms. Extra guts and glory on the side. This here. This is a talking fish bone."

"You're thinking about this all wrong. It's not so much what you look like. It's what's inside that he can't stand." Forge says trying to make things better but failing.

"Thank you, for summing that up." Rogue says sarcastically as they reach the doorway.

"Look, the point is, stop trying so hard to be something you're not." Forge says as we hear grumbling not from Rogue but from Chavonnie26.

Rogue sighs heavily.

"I just want to be one of you guys." Rogue says as Forge eyes her sympathetically.

Rogue turns and goes through the front door. And straight out the back door. She hurries off into the woods, determined to find the Rebel.

* * *

**That should do it for the day. I'm Chavonnie26 and I parody it so you don't have to.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: I don't own X-Men Evolution or How To Train Your Mutant.**

* * *

A noisy din of protesting voices leads to... Wolverine, glowering in the firelight. Surrounded by his men.

"Either we finish them or they'll finish us! It's the only way we'll be rid of them! If we find the nest and destroy it, the dragons will leave. They'll find another home." Wolverine states as he sinks his blade into a large nautical map, spread out on the table.

The blade pierces the middle of an uncharted corner, swirling with painted sea monsters and dragons. It's clear that Chavonnie had Colossus design a few of the props and sets.

"One more search. Before the ice sets in." Wolverine says decidedly trying to make it sound like he didn't want to run away from Rogue's new found clumsiness.

"Those ships never come back." A Viking says afraid for his life.

"We're Vikings. It's an occupational hazard. Now who's with me?" Wolverine states very matter of factly as he throws up his fist.

No one follows. The crowds shifts in restless silence. Head scratches. Eyes averted.

"Today's not good for me." A Viking says feebly really not wanting to go.

"I've gotta do my axe returns." Another Viking says just as feeble.

"Alright. Those who stay will look after Rogue." Wolverine says as hands immediately jut into the air, volunteers galore.

Enthusiastic murmurs of prep and packing fill the room. (Huh I should try that trick more often. Oh Matt if you don't leave you have to wash Snowy. *Little brother runs out the door at lightning speed* Thanks Wolvie.)

"To the ships!" Jubilee says ready to go.

"I'm with you Logan!" Mr Grey (Jean's Father) says also ready to go.

"That's more like it." Wolverine says dryly as the Vikings rush for the door, leaving Forge and Wolverine alone.

Forge gulps back the contents of his tankard attachment and scrapes back the bench. (Knowing the types of bad directors out there I may need to invest in one of those *Sees a poster for a M. Knight Shamalan movie and shudders before grabbing a bottle of whiskey* this is the only way you can survive a movie by him *downs at least half the bottle in one gulp* Nighty night *falls over in a dead faint before waking up with a bad hangover* Stupid super metabolism.)

"I'll pack my undies." Forge says heading for the door.

"No, I need you to stay and train some new recruits." Wolverine says and from the tone in his voice it's clear that he wants to be the one to train the recruits.

"Oh, perfect. And while I'm busy, Rogue can cover the stall. Molten steel, razor sharp blades, lots of time to herself...what could possibly go wrong?" Forge says giving us all a very bad idea of what would happen if that did occur. (Thanks for the nightmares.)

Wolverine sinks onto the bench beside Forge, his brow burdened.

"What am I going to do with her Forge?" Wolverine asks his tone very tired.

"Put her in training with the others." Forge says simply as if it were the best idea ever. (Bad idea! Bad idea Forge! Trust me on this one!)

"No, I'm serious." Wolverine says thinking that Forge was joking.

"So am I." Forge says seriously as Wolverine turns to him, glaring.

"She'd be killed before you let the first dragon out of its cage." Wolverine says giving Chavonnie26 an idea to deal with a temperamental family member. (Ahh nothing better than having a TAB while watching your brother be chased by dragons *takes long sip of her drink as a bunch of dragons chase her brother*)

"Oh, you don't know that." Forge says being very optimistic.

"I do know that, actually." Wolverine says being rational.

"No, you don't." Forge says and I'm starting if his brain has been fried after working at the forge for so long. (Ha Forge working at a forge. Good one. _Do you mind I'm trying to tell a story here. _Be my guest. I really should go see a shrink soon for my split personalities. _Ya think?_)

"No, actually I do." Wolverine says not wanting to put anyone in danger.

"No you don't!" Forge shouts trying to get his point across.

"Listen! You know what she's like. From the time she could crawl she's been...different. She doesn't listen." Wolverine says trying to get through to Forge. (This is starting to sound way too close for comfort.)

"Has the attention span of a sparrow. I take her fishing and she goes hunting for... for trolls." Wolverine says fed up with Rogue's behaviour.

"Trolls exist! They steal your socks." Forge says defensively before saying darkly, "But only the left ones. What's with that?" (Ohh that's where those socks go. Excuse me for a moment *beats up troll and gets socks back* Continue.)

"When I was a boy..." Wolverine begins likely to go into a long speel we've probably all heard before.

"Oh here we go." Forge grumbles acting like most kids would when they get a lecture by their parents.

"My father told me to bang my head against a rock and I did it. I thought it was crazy, but I didn't question him. And you know what happened?" Wolverine asks and I think we all know what happened with that thick skull of his. (*while being held at claw point by Wolverine* She said it not me. _But we are essentially the same person. _Not helping.)

"You got a headache." Forge says stating the obvious.

"That rock split in two. It taught me what a Viking could do, Forge. He could crush mountains, level forests, tame seas! Even as a boy, I knew what I was, what I had to become." Wolverine says with stars in his eyes before saying, "Rogue is not that person."

"You can't stop her, Logan. You can only prepare her." Forge says being more of a father than Wolverine.

"Look, I know it seems hopeless. But the truth is you won't always be around to protect her. She's going to get out there again. She's probably out there now." Forge says as we zoom in on Wolverine as Forge's words hit their mark.

* * *

We see an open notebook. A drawn map of the island, covered in X's. Rogue looks up from it and peeks over a gorge, expectantly. She sees nothing. She adds another 'X' to the page and then scratches her pencil over the whole map in frustration. She snaps the book closed and pockets it.

"Uggh, the gods hate me. Some people lose their knife or their mug. No, not me. I manage to lose an entire dragon." Rogue says really ticked off and I'm starting to get worried that she may have been spending too much time with Chavonnie26. (Hey! _Well she is starting to sound a lot like you_. You have a point.)

Rogue whacks a low-hanging branch. It snaps back at her, hitting her in the face. She looks up to see a snapped tree trunk. Her eyes follow it to a long trench of up-turned earth. She follows it to a downed, black dragon, its body and tail tangled in a bola. It appears dead. Rogue approaches, beaming.

"Oh wow. I did it. I did it. This fixes everything." Rogue says in shock before saying "Yes!" completely elated.

She strikes a victory pose, planting his foot on the fallen Rebel.

"I have brought down this mighty beast!" Rogue says triumphantly as the dragon suddenly shifts.

"Whoa!" Rogue says as she springs back, terrified.

She turns her blade on it. Rattled, Rogue creeps along the length of the weak, wounded dragon, dagger poised to strike. As she reaches the head, Rogue finds the Rebel staring coldly at her with unblinking dark brown eyes. Rogue tries to look away, but she's drawn back to its unnerving, unflinching stare. With the dragon safety tangled in the ropes, Rogue jabs with her dagger, puffing herself up with false bravado.

"I'm going to kill you, Dragon. I'm gonna cut out your heart and take it to my father. I'm a Viking." Rogue says her voice shaky before shouting out "I am a VIKING!" (Sure you are and I have a split personality one of which is a pyromaniac. _I hate to break it too you but you do. _Would you please just get back to the story?)

Rogue raises the dagger, determined to prove her Viking-ness. The dragon's laboured breathing breaks Rogue's clenched concentration. She opens an eye, uncertainty leaking through. The dragon holds the stare. Something profound is exchanged. Finally, the Rebel closes its eye and lowers its head, resigned to its fate. Rogue tries to go through with it, holding the dagger aloft... fighting herself... until finally lowering it with a frustrated sigh. She looks over the dragon's chaffed rope wounds.

"I did this." Rogue mutters ashamed at herself as she turns to leave but pauses and glances back at the dragon, chest heaving.

Rogue grumbles. She checks over her shoulder to ensure that no one is watching... then hurries back to cut the ropes. Rebel's eye shoots open. With the dragon watching her every move, Rogue hurriedly saws through the bola ropes. As the last rope falls free, the Rebel suddenly pounces! In a blur, the dragon is upon her, pinning Rogue down, grazing her neck. Looking like it's about to kill her. Rogue is paralyzed. The dragon's breath ruffles her hair. Rogue opens her eyes to find the Rebel's wolf-like stare boring into her. The exchange is intense, profound.

The dragon draws a deep breath, as though it's about to torch her, then lets out an ear-piercing scream instead. It turns and takes flight, flapping violently through the canopy of trees. It bashes against a nearby mountain side, recovers, and drops out of view some distance away. Winded, Rogue struggles to his feet, staggers a few steps, collapses to her knees, and faints. (Note to self never self-cast myself in any rolls *rubs aching back from where she landed in Rebel form* _I warned you not too. *Ducks shoe thrown at her* Touchy._)

* * *

At Wolverine's home, Rogue enters to see... Wolverine, seated on a thick slice of tree-trunk. He is slouched over the fire-pit, stirring the coals with his axe. Embers waft around his side-burns. Rogue tries to sneak past, up the stairs to her room. Wolverine seems none the wiser, when...

"Rogue." Wolverine says not even turning to look at her.

"Dad. Uh..." Rogue says freaking out as Wolverine stands and she takes a deep breath.

"I, uh... I have to talk to you, Dad." Rogue says very nervous.

"I need to speak with you too, Stripes." Wolverine says not nervous at all.

Rogue and Wolver straighten at the same moment. (Geez I've heard of like father like daughter but this is ridiculous.)

"I've decided I don't want to I think it's time you learn fight dragons. to fight dragons." Rogue and Wolverine say at the same time making it hard to understand either of them before waiting a beat and asking "What?"

"You go first." Wolverine says being gracious.

"No, you go first." Rogue says buying more time to get her confidence up.

"Alright. You get your wish. Dragon training. You start in the morning." Wolverine says shocking Rogue.

"Oh man, I should've gone first. Uh, 'cause I was thinking, you know we have a surplus of dragon-fighting Vikings, but do we have enough bread-making Vikings, or small home repair Vikings—" Rogue says scrambling to word her response properly.

"-You'll need this." Wolverine says as he hands Rogue his axe. Rogue avoids taking it.

"I don't want to fight dragons." Rogue says trying to get her point across to the very stubborn Wolverine. (Good luck with that. *Notices angry Wolverine behind her* Uh never mind.)

"Come on. Yes, you do." Wolverine says not really hearing what Rogue was saying.

"Rephrase. Dad I can't kill dragons." Rogue says starting to sound a little desperate.

"But you will kill dragons." Wolverine says as if it were natural.

"No, I'm really very extra sure that I won't." Rogue says really getting worried as Chavonnie26 shovels popcorn in her mouth while watching. (*muffled from popcorn* This is better than soap operas._ Please we already have one playing in our head. _Ah the downsides to being an author. Hearing your character's voices in your head.)

"It's time Rogue." Wolverine says sternly obviously at his breaking point.

"Can you not hear me?" Rogue asks voicing the question we were all wondering.

"This is serious Stripes!" Wolverine says as he forces the axe into Rogue's hands.

Its weight drags her down. She looks up to see Wolverine under-lit with firelight.

"When you carry this axe... you carry all of us with you. Which means you walk like us. You talk like us. You think like us. No more of..." Wolverine says before gesturing non-specifically at Rogue and saying, " ... this."

"You just gestured to all of me." Rogue says completely insulted. (Wow twice in one movie. I smell a running gag *sees gag go running by* I was right)

"Deal?" Wolverine asks knowing the answer already.

"This conversation is feeling very one-sided." Rogue says and is it just me or is she stating the obvious a lot in this movie.

"DEAL?!" Wolverine bellows and both myself and Chavonnie26 clap our hands over our ears at the sound.

Rogue glances at the axe in her hands. It's a no-win argument. (Gee I never would have guessed. _Please would you stop with the sarcasm? _Never *cackles like Pyro after eating a ton of sugar*)

"Deal." Rogue says sounding resigned and defeated.

Satisfied, Wolverine grabs his helmet and duffel bag... and heads for the door.

"Good. Train hard. I'll be back. Probably." Wolverine says not even a little nervous due to his healing factor.

"And I'll be here. Maybe." Rogue says as Wolverine heads out the door, leaving her holding the axe.

* * *

**And done. Now if you'll excuse me I have a therapist appointment. Maybe I can finally get rid of the voices in my head. I'm Chavonnie26 and I parody it so you don't have to.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: I don't own X-Men Evolution or How To Train Your Dragon.**

* * *

The next day Forge raises a massive iron gate at the entrance of a vast stone arena.

"Welcome to dragon training!" Forge says excitedly as the recruits file through the gate, and out onto the arena floor.

They take it in like gladiators entering the coliseum. The walls are covered in scorched silhouettes of blasted Vikings. It's a grim yet awe-inspiring place. (Uh should I get out my shield now or later? *sees amount of dragons behind the gates* Now! *whips out shield that has an insignia of a bunch of puzzle pieces* _Really? _Hey if you want to be barbequed fine by me but I happen to like having my body unscorched)

"No turning back." Remy says excited to be there.

"I hope I get some serious burns." Pietro says and everyone in the audience who doesn't like him hopes the same.

"I'm hoping for some mauling, like on my shoulder or lower back." Wanda says as if she were talking about getting a tattoo.

"Yeah, it's only fun if you get a scar out of it." Remy says and I'm starting to wonder about the sanity of Vikings. (Please we're completely sane *Tosses an axe that barely misses hitting Gambit* HOW DARE YOU JOIN THE ACOLYTES?! *chases after him with all the Viking weaponry from Forge's forge*)

"Yeah, no kidding, right? Pain. Love it." Rogue says off screen as the recruits turn to see Rogue behind them. Groans all around.

"Oh great. Who let her in?" Pietro asks and does anyone else really want to blast him? (Working on it *holds a flamethrower at Gambit and Pietro* That's right Pyro isn't the only pyromaniac author around here! Run my little monkeys run! *Gambit and Pietro run away while she chases them with the flamethrower*.)

"Let's get started! The recruit who does best will win the honour of killing his first dragon in front of the entire village." Forge says ready to get started.

"Rogue already killed a Rebel, so does that disqualify her or...?" Jean asks as the recruits laugh and chatter in the background.

"Can I transfer to the class with the cool Vikings?" Pietro asks and we hear a scoff from everyone who thinks he isn't cool.

Forge throws a supportive arm around Rogue and ushers her along.

"Don't worry. You're small and you're weak. That'll make you less of a target. They'll see you as sick or insane and go after the more Viking-like teens instead." Forge says cheerily and in confidence of Rogue.

Forge sticks Rogue in line with the others and continues on toward five massive reinforced doors. Terrible roars and bellows issue from within. (*while covered in cuts and scratches* Trust me it took a lot to get them in there.)

"Behind these doors are just a few of the many species you will learn to fight." Forge says as Scott bounces and giggles with excitement, barely able to contain himself. (Huh I guess I shouldn't have slipped all those mushrooms and sugar into his coffee.)

"The Deadly Spyke." Forge lists and I get the feeling that Spyke is getting a big head from being called deadly.

"Speed eight. Armour sixteen." Scott says under his breath.

"The Vicious ShadowCrawler." Forge lists and we hear a bunch of laughter from Chavonnie at the thought of Kitty being vicious.

"Plus eleven stealth. Times two." Scott says still under his breath.

"The Monstrous Pyro." Forge says and we hear a yelp.

"Firepower fifteen." Scott says still under his breath.

"The Terrible Sabretooth." Forge says and we hear a laugh from Wolverine.

"Attack eight. Healing twelve." Scott says still under his breath unaware of how annoying he was being.

"CAN YOU STOP THAT?!" Forge yells before waiting a beat and saying, "And...the Blob."

"Jaw strength, eight." Scott says quietly to himself.

Forge pulls a lever, raising the cross beam on the last of the doors.

"Whoa, wait! Aren't you gonna teach us first!?" Jean asks completely scared of facing the dragon without any training or her powers.

"I believe in learning on the job." Forge says with a somewhat insane smirk.

BAM! A Blob thunders out of its cave, charging into the ring like an irate rhino. The recruits scramble in every direction. Except for Wanda and Pietro who rush toward it, like pumped-up rodeo clowns.

"Today is about survival. If you get blasted, you're dead. Quick, what's the first thing you're going to need?" Forge asks in a very safe place behind a shield.

"A doctor?" Rogue asks from her hiding place.

"Superpowers?" Scott asks from his hiding place.

"A shield." Remy says already running for one.

"Shields. Go." Forge says as the recruits scramble for shields, finding them scattered around the ring.

"Your most important piece of equipment is your shield. If you must make a choice between a sword or a shield, take the shield." Forge says as everyone grabs a shield.

Rogue struggles to lift hers. Forge helps her and sends her running. Pietro and Wanda stand amidst a dozen shields. But only one has a skull painted on it. They both grab it.

"Get your hands off my shield!" Pietro says being a total jerk.

"There are like a million shields!" Wanda says sounding a lot like Kitty. (Man I never thought I'd be sorry for a villain before.)

"Take that one, it has a flower on it. Girls like flowers." Pietro says as Wanda uses the shield to bash him in the face. He doesn't let go.

"Ooops, now this one has blood on it." Wanda says and I believe all the Pietro haters out there like her more and more.

The Blob takes aim at the distracted twins. Blam! The shield is blasted out of both of their hands. Pietro and Wanda spin like tops and go down.

"Pietro, Wanda, you're out!" Forge says to the dazed teens.

"What?!" Pietro asks completely dazed.

"What?!" Wanda asks completely confused.

The Blob scoops up a pile of rocks and swallows them back. The teens gather on the far side of the ring.

"Those shields are good for another thing. Noise. Make lots of it to throw off a dragon's aim." Forge says as me and Chavonnie strap on noise cancelling earphones.

The kids scoop up weapons and begin hammering on their shields. The Blob shakes its head at the clatter.

Blob's POV - the teens targets become blurry and scrambled. It's working. (No I wouldn't have guessed.)

"All dragons have a limited number of shots. How many does a Blob have?" Forge asks waiting for the answer.

"Five!" Jean shouts out hoping she was right.

"No, six." Scott corrects using all the geeky knowledge instilled in him by Chavonnie.

"Correct, six. That's one for each of you!" Forge says scaring everyone.

"I really don't think my parents would—" Scott says really scared.

BAM! Scott has his shield blasted away.

"Scott, out." Forge says as he spots Rogue hiding from the Blob's molten slugs.

"Rogue, get in there!" Forge bellows as we turn to Remy bouncing on his heels, ready to dodge a blast.

Jean appears, trying to hit on him. (_I can see why you put Jean in the role of Snot Lout. _I just couldn't resist sicking the ROMY and JOTT fans on her plus I can't stand cannon Mary-Sues so this all balances out. _Indeed.)_

"So anyway I'm moving into my parents' basement. You should come by sometime to work out. You look like you work out—" Jean says failing epically as Remy cartwheels out of the way, allowing a shot to shoot past him and hit Jean's shield. She's blasted onto her back.

"Jean! You're done!" Forge shouts as all Jean haters cheer.

Remy rolls to a stop beside Rogue, who stirs awkwardly, trying to look cool.

"So, I guess it's just you and me huh?" Rogue says her voice squeaking a little in nervousness.

"No. Just you." Remy says as he rolls away. A split-second later a lava slug knocks Rogue's shield clear off of her arm. Rogue is exposed. (NOT LIKE THAT! Sorry been spending way too much time around guys. _Very true. The ratio of girls to boys in her school is about 4:1._)

"One shot left!" Forge calls out as Rogue panics and chases after her shield as it rolls across the ring.

The sudden movement sends the Blob chasing after her, leaving Remy in the clear.

"Rogue!" Forge yells out worried.

The Blob drives straight toward Rogue, pinning her against the wall. It opens its mouth and cocks its tail, ready to fire point-blank. Forge lunges in and hooks the Blob's mouth at the last second, causing its head to jerk back and fire against the stone wall above Rogue's head.

"And that's six!" Forge says rattled but masking it as he wrestles the irate Blob back into his pen.

"Go back to bed, ya overgrown sausage! You'll get another chance, don't you worry." Forge says managing to get the Blob in his pen.

Slam! Lock. Forge turns to the recruits.

"Remember... a dragon will always, (with a stern look to Rogue) always go for the kill." Forge says as he hoists Rogue to her feet and walks off. Rogue looks overhead to see a steaming pit in the solid stone wall.

We quickly cut back to the woods where Rogue is battered after another disastrous day in the ring. She studies the remnants of the discarded bola... revealing that she's back at the scene of the crime.

"So...why didn't you?" Rogue mutters as she drops the bola and presses on in the direction it flew off.

She drops into a rocky crevice and follows it to an isolated cove complete with a pristine spring pool. She scans the high stone walls... then notices a single black scale on the ground. She crouches and picks it up, studying it.

"Well this was stupid." Rogue says as suddenly, the Rebel blasts past her.

Rogue recoils, watching the massive beast struggle to climb the walls. It flaps violently, and then peels away to a rough landing. The dragon is trapped. Rogue grins, excited to see it again, and slips closer. She watches as the dragon, exhausted and frustrated, leaps into the air, beating its wings furiously. Again and again, it rolls uncontrolled and crashes heavily. As if remembering to snap a photo, Rogue pulls a leather-bound book and flips past drawings of weapons to a blank page.

She sketches the dragon quickly, desperate to record the image. The Rebel claws at the steep rock walls, trying climb out of the cove. It slips and falls hard, crushing several saplings. The Rebel rolls back to her feet and slowly crawls to the water's edge. She spots fish in the shallow water and snaps at them... but comes up empty. She lowers her head, looking weakened.

"Why don't you just...fly away?" Rogue mutters as she spots the problem.

She adjusts her drawing, carefully erasing one half of the dragon's tail. She accidentally drops the charcoal stick. It rolls off of the rock outcropping that hides him from view and bounces into the cove. TINK. TINK. TINK. The Rebel raises her head, spotting Rogue. They exchange a profound, unflinching stare.

* * *

We are now in the great hall where a storm is brewing outside. The great doors rattle on their hinges. (Ah nothing better than a storm provided by Storm huh? _I wouldn't know I barely get use of our body.)_

"Alright. Where did Remy go wrong in the ring today?" Forge asks off screen

The recruits are seated at a table, eating dinner by the glow of the fire pit.

"Remy mistimed his summersault dive. It was sloppy. It threw off his reverse tumble." Remy says getting eye rolls from the group.

"Yeah. We noticed." Wanda says sarcastically.

"No, no, you were great. That was so Remy." Jean says grabbing Remy's hand only for him to pull it away. (Okay how do we keep the ROMY and JOTT fans away from Jean until the end of the movie? _You're asking me? I have no clue. _*Blots the doors with adamantium locks* that should hold them for a while.)

"He's right, you have to be tough on yourselves." Forge says as we hear a creak.

All eyes turn to Rogue, entering the hall, sheepishly. Forge glares at her.

"Where did Rogue go wrong?" Forge asks still glaring at Rogue.

Rogue tries to take a seat at the table...

"She showed up." Wanda says being nasty.

"She didn't get eaten." Pietro says following Wanda's lead.

... but the recruits keep closing the gaps. Rolling her eyes, Rogue sits at the vacant table next to them.

"She's never where she should be." Remy says and I'm pretty sure all the ROMY fans are gonna kill me for typing that. (Please they're trying to kill us now! *Presses body against bulging door*)

"Thank you, Remy." Forge says as he stands.

"You need to live and breathe this stuff." Forge says as he lays a giant book in the center of the table.

"The dragon manual. Everything we know about every dragon we know of." Forge says as a rumble of thunder shakes the hall. Rain pours down outside.

"No attacks tonight. Study up." Forge says as he exits into the storm, leaving the teens staring at the book.

"Wait, you mean read?" Pietro asks as if he couldn't believe it.

"While we're still alive?" Wanda asks and I'm starting to wonder what they have against reading.

"Why read words when you can just kill the stuff the words tell you stuff about?" Jean says as if it were simple. (That's how extinction happens.)

"Oh! I've read it like, seven times. There's this water dragon that sprays boiling water at your face. And there's this other one that buries itself for like a week..." Scott says as the teens stare as he goes on too long.

"Yeah, that sounds great. There was a chance I was going to read that..." Pietro says now really reluctant to read the book.

"...but now..." Wanda says continuing on Pietro's train of thought.

Jean gets up to go.

"You guys read, I'll go kill stuff." Jean says as the others follow, with Scott in tow.

"Oh and there's this other one that has these spines that look like trees..." Scott rattles on, Chavonnie put down that tranq gun! (But I really want to hit him! _You know the rules. _Fine *reluctantly puts down tranq gun*)

Remy is the last to go.

"So I guess we'll share—"Rogue says hoping to spend some time with Remy.

"Read it." Remy says as he pushes it toward her and leaves.

"All mine then. Wow, so okay. I'll see you—"Rogue says only to get a slammed door as an answer.

"Tomorrow." Rogue says with a sigh. (*sobs uncontrollably* This is so much like my life *blows nose noisily* _there, there. I've heard of consoling yourself but this is ridiculous!_)

We quickly dissolve to the great hall late at night and zoom in on Rogue's hand opening the massive book. Thunder booms outside. The hall is vacant and dark, but for the few candles she's pulled together. Rogue pours through page after page of strange and frightening dragons.

"Dragon classifications. Strike class. Fear class. Mystery class." Rouge voice overs as she turns the page.

"Siryn. This reclusive dragon inhabits sea caves and dark tide pools." Rogue voice overs as we zoom in on the pictures.

"When startled, the Siryn produces a concussive sound that can kill a man at close range. Extremely dangerous. Kill on sight."

Rogue's eyes drift to a lurid illustration of decapitated Vikings. Another page, another dragon.

"Timberius. This gigantic creature has razor sharp wings that can slice through full grown trees...extremely dangerous. Kill on sight."

The illustrations seem to take on a life of their own, shifting and squirming in the candlelight. (Yeah that happens when you read really late at night.)

"Magma. Sprays boiling magma at its victim. Extremely dangerous."

The storm outside rages against the shuttered windows. Rogue is startled, but presses on.

"Mystique. Even newly hatched dragons can spray acid. Kill on sight."

She begins flipping through the pages. A blur of dragons...

"Blob. ShadowCrawler. The Storm. Marrow. Magneto. Burns its victims. Buries its victims. Chokes its victims. Turns its victims inside-out. Extremely dangerous. Extremely dangerous. Kill on sight. Kill on sight. Kill on sight..."

Rogue finally lands upon the page she's been looking for.

"Rebel."

It's BLANK - no image, save for a few, sparse details.

"Speed unknown. Size unknown. The unholy offspring of lightning and death itself." (I resent that remark *holds up lightning bolt* and anyone who calls me that again is gonna be burned to a crisp.)

"Never engage this dragon. Your only chance, hide and pray it does not find you." (Now that's more like it.)

Rogue pulls her sketchbook out of her vest and opens it to her drawing of Chavonnie as a dragon. She lays it over the book's blank page and considers it. We zoom in on the drawing of Chavonnie...

* * *

**And done. As you can see the voices aren't going anywhere any time soon so please bear with me. I'm Chavonnie26 and I parody it so you don't have to.**


	4. Chapter 4

**I don't own X-Men Evolution or How To Train Your Dragon.**

* * *

We cut to the high seas at dawn and see a painted dragon, with a sword run through it. It's the billowing sail of Wolverine's ship. Wolverine hovers over the familiar nautical map - his eyes on the uncharted corner, swirling in mist and illustrations of dragons.

"I can almost smell them. They're close. Steady." Wolverine says the sea water messing with his nose a little.

Wolverine raises his gaze to... an epic fog bank courtesy of Storm, towering from sky to sea like a bruised, daunting curtain, beyond which nothing is visible. The three ships drift alongside it, skirting its solid edge, looking for an opening. On deck the crewmen mill nervously, all too aware of what Wolverine is considering.

"Take us in." Wolverine says and the helmsman steers Wolverine's ship into the fog. The men draw their weapons, prepping for the worst.

"Hard to port... for Helheim's gate." A Viking says ready to run home screaming.

The first ship disappears into the whiteout, followed by the other two. Suddenly a flash of light. A silhouette of a dragon. Hollers. Sounds of splitting and shattering wood. Plunges into the water. Another bright flash.

* * *

We cut to a close up on a dragon painted onto a shield. Rogue runs her finger over its outline.

"You know, I just happened to notice the book had nothing on Rebels. Is there another book? Or a sequel? Maybe a little Rebel pamphlet?" Rouge asks not focusing on her lesson

KABLAM! A blast takes the axe head off of Rogue's hilt, leaving a smoking hole behind her. Rogue yelps and runs.

"FOCUS Rogue! You're not even trying." Forge yells off screen as we zoom back to reveal a Deadly Spyke, loose in a maze-like arrangement of moveable walls. Forge calls orders from above.

"Today... is all about attack." Forge continues as the Spyke hops from wall to wall, sending the recruits scurrying.

"Spykes are quick and light on their feet. Your job is to be quicker and lighter." Forge says as the teens move in, stumbling over Rogue and her unwieldy shield.

The Spyke spots Scott's rear hiding behind a wall. It whips its tail of spikes. Scott screams and lifts an entire wall to shield himself from the spray.

"I'm really beginning to question your teaching methods." Scott squeaks as all the Scott haters enjoy the show. (This is better than TV! *munches on some popcorn*)

"Look for its blind spot. Every dragon has one. Find it, hide in it, and strike." Forge says as Wanda and Pietro rush in, diving and rolling up to the Spyke's nose.

The Spyke sniffs the air - it can't see them. Pietro and Wanda are smashed together - too close for comfort.

"Do you ever bathe?" Wanda asks and judging from the amount of cologne he wears it's a valid question.

"If you don't like it, then just get your own blind spot." Pietro says unaware of the safe dangling over him. (Please may I cut the rope? _After the parody. _Great! *Holds big scissors by the rope in anticipation*.)

"How about I give you one!" Wands says as she and Pietro shove each other, till their movement and noise gives them away. The Spyke attacks, snapping at both of them.

"Blind spot? Yes. Deaf spot? Not so much." Forge says as Rogue wanders up to him, while the others dart past.

"Hey, so how would one sneak up on a Rebel?" Rogue asks hoping to get more info.

"None one's ever met one and lived to tell the tale. Now get in there." Forge says sternly.

"I know, I know, but hypothetically..." Rogue says trying to squeeze some info from Forge.

"Rogue!" Remy whispers as he puts his finger to his lips and gestures for her to hide.

A moment later, the Spyke leaps over the walls, surprising them by landing in front of her. Remy somersaults into its blind spot, confusing it. He rears back to strike - just as Jean leaps in, protectively sweeping Remy behind her.

"Watch out babe. I'll take care of this." Jean says trying to show off as all the Jean haters get their popcorn ready picturing what might happen.

"Hey!" Remy shouts as Jean misses. Remy glares at her.

"The sun was in my eyes, Remy. What do you want me to do, block out the sun? I could do that, but I don't have time right now!" Jean says defensive while the Jean haters groan at her not being blasted with fire.

The Spyke tears off after Remy, knocking down walls in pursuit. He leaps and dives like a highly trained gymnast. Rogue wanders up to Forge again.

"They probably take the daytime off. You know, like a cat. Has anyone ever seen one napping?" Rogue asks clearly not letting the matter drop.

"Rogue!" Forge yells trying to get her to concentrate.

"-Rogue!" Remy calls out trying to warn her.

Rogue spins around to see the maze walls collapsing like dominos toward her. Remy comes flying through the dust and crash-lands on top of her, laying him out in a limb-tangled mess.

"Oooh! Love on the battlefield!" Pietro says pointing at them as ROMY fans squeal and snap photos. (How did they get in? _Air ducts. _Right. *Throws out ROMY fans and blocks up the air ducts* that should buy us some time.)

"He could do better." Wanda says as the Spyke closes in, emerging through the cloud of dust.

"Just... let me... why don't you..." Rogue says struggling to untangle herself from Remy. (And she wants to this because? _I'm not sure. *both shrug*) _

The Spyke spins around and races back toward them like a Raptor. Remy untangles himself and tries to pull his axe from Rogue's shield... which is attached to her limp, gangly arm. He plants her foot on her stomach and yanks the axe free, still burrowed into the shield. He spins and swings the axe and shield, scoring a direct hit on the oncoming Spyke's nose. It yelps and scurries off.

"Well done, Remy." Forge says before hobbling off to wrestle the Spyke back into his cave.

Rogue gets to her feet - all eyes are upon her. She turns to find Remy glaring at him, winded.

"Is this some kind of a joke to you? Our parents' war is about to become ours. Figure out which side you're on." Remy says as he grabs his axe and stomps off.

Rogue watches, stung.

* * *

We quickly cut to the cove at a magic hour and see a fish... being thrown into the cove. It hits the ground and slides. A moment later, Rogue peeks through a gap in the rock, looking around cautiously. Nothing. Rogue squeezes through and enters the cove. A beat, then Rogue hears a snort from behind her. Rogue turns to see the Rebel, crouched on a rock like a stealthy panther. It descends, approaching her... ready to pounce. Rogue swallows her fear and offers the fish. Doing so reveals the dagger at her waist. The dragon sees it and hisses. (What I don't like knives.)

Rogue reaches for it, eliciting a growl. She pauses, carefully lifts it by the handle, and tosses it away. The dragon calms. As it approaches the fish, Rogue notices that it's missing teeth.

"Huh. Toothless. I could've sworn you had..." Rouge says as a set of razor sharp teeth emerge from its gums to grab the fish. Chavonnie snatches and gnashes it up, swallowing it.

"... teeth." Rogue finishes as the teeth retract again.

Chavonnie presses closer with an expectant look. Rogue retreats nervously.

"Uh, no. No, I don't have any more." Rogue says as the Rebel backs her against a rock, placing herself the same position as before. The dragon closes in over her, staring blankly.

A tense moment passes... then Chavonnie regurgitates a chunk of fish onto Rogue's lap. They exchange stares. Rogue realizes what Chavonnie wants her to do. Rogue crouches slowly and squeamishly picks it up. The dragon waits expectantly. Rogue gags and gnaws off a bite of the slimy fish. She forces a smile. Chavonnie mimics her. Amazed, Rogue sits up and tries to touch her. Chavonnie hisses and flaps off to a crash on the other side of the cove. (No touchy the dragon.) She blasts the mossy ground to a red-hot temperature...and curls up on it like a giant dog. She turns to find Rogue seated beside her. Chavonnie tolerates her persistent presence... until Rogue tries to touch her damaged tail. Chavonnie snaps at her. Rogue takes the hint and leaves.

We dissolve to the cove later in the day and it's magic hour again. Chavonnie wakes, hanging upside down from a tree. She spots Rogue sitting on the other side of the cove. Sketching in the sand. We zoom in on a sketch of Chavonnie. Rogue draws with a stick, minding her own business. Chavonnie appears behind her, watching carefully. Aware of her presence, Rogue continues, trying not to scare her off. Chavonnie walks off. A moment later, she reappears with an entire sapling, drawing lines in the sand. She rushes here and there, making haphazard lines in every direction.

Finally, Chavonnie drops the tree and inspects her work. She seems pleased. (You try drawing with your mouth!) Rogue stands and takes in the sprawling scribble, amazed by it. She accidentally steps onto one of the lines, eliciting an instant growl from Chavonnie. She steps on it again. Chavonnie growls again. Realizing how sensitive she is, Rogue steps carefully between each line, turning round and round until she unwittingly bumps into Chavonnie. Chavonnie snorts. Once again, they're face to face. Rogue slowly extends her hand. Chavonnie hesitates. Rogue turns her head away and closes her eyes. To her amazement, Chavonnie bridges the gap and presses her muzzle against Rogue's hand. In a flash, the dragon is gone, leaving Rogue astounded.

* * *

We quickly zip back to the village where Forge and the recruits are seated at the top of an abandoned catapult tower, toasting campfire food around a roaring bonfire.

"...and with one twist he took my hand and swallowed it whole. And I saw the look on his face." Forge says telling the story of how he lost his limbs before saying in a voice that says you can't deny it, "I was delicious. He must have passed the word, because it wasn't a month before another one of them took my leg."

"Isn't it weird to think that your hand was inside a dragon. Like if your mind was still in control of it you could have killed the dragon from the inside by crushing his heart or something." Scott says and I think it's safe to say that we are all grossed out by his train of thought. (Yeah it probably was a bad idea to slip those mushrooms into his coffee.)

"I swear I'm so angry right now. I'll avenge your beautiful hand and your beautiful foot. I'll chop off the legs of every dragon I fight, with my face." Jean says as postures to Remy who rolls his eyes.

"Un-unh. It's the wings and the tails you really want. If it can't fly, it can't get away. A downed dragon is a dead dragon." Forge says with a mouthful of food.

We zoom in on Rogue hiding her horrified look form the others. Forge stands and stretches.

"Alright. I'm off to bed. You should be too. Tomorrow we get into the big boys. Slowly but surely making our way up to the Monstrous Pyro." Forge says before saying playfully, "But who'll win the honour of killing it?"

He hobbles off. The teens reflect.

"It's gonna be me." Pietro says very matter of fact, "It's my destiny. See?"

Pietro rolls up his sleeve to reveal a red dragon on his arm.

"Your dad let you get a tattoo?" Scott says almost in awe. (I don't get the appeal of tattoos. I really don't.)

"It's not a tattoo. It's a birthmark." Pietro says and just from the colour anyone could tell it was a tattoo.

"Okay, I've been stuck with you since birth, and that was never there before." Wanda says and I'm starting to wonder if they're all colour blind.

"Yes it was. You've just never seen me from the left side until now." Pietro says and I'm starting to think that potato thing is looking very plausible.

"It wasn't there yesterday. Is it a birthmark or a today-mark?" Jean asks as Rogue gets up and walks away from the group.

Remy watches her as she leaves the bonfire.

* * *

We dissolve to the blacksmith later in the evening where Rogue enters a small room at the back of the stall. It's covered in drawings of weaponry and scale models. She lights a candle and lays her sketchbook out on the desk, opening it to the drawing of Chavonnie. With a look of determination. Rogue picks up a charcoal stick and re-draws the missing tail.

Later in the evening we zoom in on a creaking leather bellows. The stone forge glows with every pump. Tongs pull intricate iron pieces from the coals. They're dropped onto the anvil, twisted, lightly hammered, and dunked in a barrel. The pieces are carried to Rogue's workbench and laid out in place on a one-to-one schematic. It's a sketch of a mechanical fin.

* * *

The next day we are at the cove again at dawn. Rogue arrives, winded, straining under the weight of a full basket. She kicks the scale she found (like a jar top). Chavonnie approaches, sniffing her.

"Hey Chavonnie. I brought breakfast. I hope you're hungry." Rogue says as she drops the basket and kicks it over. Fish spill out. (FISH! Sorry I just love fish!)

"Okay, that's disgusting." Rogue says struggling to keep down her breakfast as Chavonnie approaches, settling in to devour the feast.

"Uh… we've got some salmon..." Rouge says as Chavonnie swallows it.

"... some nice Icelandic cod..."

Swallows those too.

"... and a whole smoked eel."

Chavonnie nabs it, chews a few times, then spits it out. She shakes her head violently, snorts and scrubs her massive tongue on the sand. Rogue takes note. (Blech! Eel! The one seafood I can't stand!)

"No, no, no! It's okay. Yeah, I don't like eel much either." Rogue says putting the eel in her vest as Chavonnie focuses on the remainder. With the dragon distracted, Rogue unwraps her prosthetic fin and opens it like a fan.

"Okay. That's it. That's it, just stick with good stuff. And don't you mind me. I'll just be back...here. Minding my own business." Rogue says as she cautiously approaches the injured tail, but every time she gets near it, Chavonnie sweeps it away like a cat.

"It's okay." Rouge says as she drops a knee on top of the tail. Chavonnie' head juts up, slows her chewing to a halt.

"Okay...okay.." Rogue says as the dragon tenses, slowly spreading her wings.

Rogue straps the prosthetic fin in place. She cinches the straps.

"There. Not too bad. It works." Rogue says pleased with her work before Chavonnie bolts! She snaps her massive wings and takes to the air, carrying Rogue with her.

"Woah! No! No! No!" Rogue screams as she struggles to hold on to the tail.

As the ground speeds away, Chavonnie immediately tips into a uncontrolled bank and dive. Rogue sees the folded fin rattling uselessly in opposition to its flared counterpart. Flap as she may, Chavonnie can't correct her trajectory. (I really need to get a stunt person or dragon.) Rogue swallows her fear and crawls toward the folded prosthetic. She reaches it and yank it open. The flared, fan- like appendage catches the air, stabilizing the twisting tail.

"It's working!" Rouge yells excited and terrified.

Chavonnie arcs just short of the water and climbs... high into the air.

"Yes! Yes, I did it." Rogue yells elated as Chavonnie glances back at Rogue, busily holding the tail open while trying to hold on. They're going to crash. Whoomp! Rogue is suddenly thrown from the tail in the intense force of a turn.

"AAAAAGGGGHHHHH!" Rouge screams as she bounces across the water's surface and takes a dive.

Without Rogue to operate the tail, Chavonnie does the same, plunging in a massive cannonball. Rogue resurfaces, roughed up, but beaming. Chavonnie appears seconds later.

"Yeah!" Rogue says happy that one of her inventions worked.

* * *

We quickly shift to the training grounds later in the day.

"Today is about teamwork. Work together and you might survive." Forge says off screen as we zoom in on a double-wide door.

Gas seeps through the cracks. It blasts open. A cloud of smoke engulfs the ring, swirling around the paired-up teens. Remy with Wanda. Jean with Pietro. Scott with Rogue. All carry buckets of water, poised to throw them.

"Now, a wet dragon head can't light its fire. The Vicious ShadowCrawler is extra tricky. One head breathes gas, the other head lights it. Your job is to know which is which." Forge says still off screen.

The smoke encircles them, cutting them off from each other. The teens listen and watch for any sign of the dragon.

"Razor sharp, serrated teeth that inject venom for pre-digestion. Prefers ambush attack, crushing its victims in its..." Scott mutters under his breath freaking everyone out.

"Will you please stop that?" Rogue asks tensely and if I were paired up with Scott I would be tense too.

We zoom in on Jean and Pietro moving nervously through the fog, back to back. Jean is singing to herself to calm her nerves.

"If that dragon shows either of his faces, I'm gonna—"Jean starts to says but spots an approaching shape, and shouts terrified, "-There!"

Jean and Pietro hurl their water into the fog.

"Hey!" Remy shouts indignantly.

"It's us, idiots." Wanda shouts sounding really mad.

Remy and Wanda are soaked.

"Your butts are getting bigger. We thought you were a dragon." Pietro says as Chavonnie's grip on the scissors tighten just barely not cutting the rope.

"Not that there's anything wrong with a dragon-esque figure." Jean says to Remy.

Remy elbows Jean in the face. Wanda drops Pietro with a punch to the throat. Anyone else really enjoying this part right now? (I know I am. *munches on popcorn with a look of satisfaction on her face*)

"Wait." Remy says and they FREEZE. A blue and pink tail sweeps out of the fog, taking them down.

Their buckets spill. We go back to Scott and Rogue who are coming across them. They see the puddles of spilled water.

"Oh, I'm hurt. I am very much hurt." Pietro says really scared and hurt from Wanda's attack.

"Chances of survival are dwindling into single digits now..." Scott says looking ready to scream like a little girl.

"Look out!" Rogue says as a blue ShadowCrawler head emerges out of the smoke.

Scott hurls his water at it, completely dousing the head. It leers and opens its mouth, spewing gas into the area.

"Oh. Wrong head." Scott says as gas flows around their legs. Scott flees in a panic.

"Scott!" Forge yells and everything is quiet for a beat afterwards.

A clicking sound comes from behind them. Pink sparks flash in the smoke.

"Now, Rogue!" Forge yells as the other pink head sweeps out of the smoke.

Rogue hurls her water with all her might. It arcs and drops short of the dragon's sparking mouth. The dragon grins, savouring the kill.

"Oh, come on!" Rogue says really wanting to hit something.

"RUN, ROGUE!" Forge yells before covering his eyes.

"Rogue!" Forge yells again.

Everything is silent for a moment. The ShadowCrawler hesitates, sniffs and then retreats. The teens get to their feet, watching transfixed. Forge peeks through his fingers to see... the ShadowCrawler backing away from Rogue. She stands and holds her hands out, as if controlling it.

"BACK! BACK! BACK! Now don't you make me tell you again!" Rogue says making the ShadowCrawler retreat through its door and into its cave, hissing.

"Yes, that's right. Back into your cage." Rogue shouts before slyly opening her vest, revealing the spotted smoked eel from earlier. (YAHH EEL! *hides under table and hisses*)

She tosses it inside the door and then slams it shut.

"Now think about what you've done." Rogue says before turning to the teens and Forge. They stare, slack-jawed

"Okay! So are we done? Because I've got some things I need to..." Rogue says before jobbing out of the ring, past the speechless group.

"Yep...see you tomorrow." Rogue says as Remy sneers. Something's going on.

* * *

**Hope you enjoyed the long chapter. Now if you'll excuse me I have to go nurse a head cold. WHY ME?! I'm Chavonnie26 *cough* and I parody it so you don't have to.**


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer: I don't own X-Men Evolution or How To Train Your Dragon.**

* * *

Back to the blacksmith for a music montage. Rogue cuts and stitches leather, draws and shapes steel. She works by candlelight. An overhead shot reveals what she's building: a harness, complete with handles and foot pedals. We quickly shift to the cove. Rogue appears before Chavonnie, holding the new prosthetic. Chavonnie runs off as Rogue chases her down.

"Hey!" Rogue shouts trying not to trip over her own feet.

Later in the day, Chavonnie and Rogue are zooming over the ocean. The tail breaks free sending Rogue flying.

"Yeah! Whoa!" Rogue screams as they plummet.

Later in the blacksmith stall, Rogue adjusts the harness and uses a metal clamp to affix herself to Chavonnie' saddle.

At dawn in the open sky, Rogue and Chavonnie zip through the air - her rudimentary harness and tail controls are working, barely. They crash-land in an open field. Rogue recovers to find Chavonnie still rolling around in the tall grass. Rogue discovers that it's a patch of dragon-nip. Chavonnie writhes on her back, tongue wagging, in complete bliss. (Smells like fresh baked chocolate cake. *Chews some dragon nip* Tastes like it too.)

We shift to the training grounds in the morning. Rogue grabs the head as instructed, then discreetly pulls a fistful of dragon-nip and presses it up to the Blob's nose. It immediately stops struggling and goes weak in the knees. Rogue drops the handful of dragon-nip to the ground. The Blob goes down with it, whimpering and blissful. From Forge and the recruits' point of view, Rogue is controlling the Blob with no more than a limp arm.

We cut to the woods in the afternoon. The recruits walk home together, surrounding Rogue and bombarding her with questions.

"Hey Rogue, I've never seen a Blob do that before." Scott says almost worshiping Rogue.

"How'd you do that?" Pietro asks also almost worshipping Rogue.

"It was really cool." Wanda says and is it just me or are they playing a drastically different tune to the one they were playing at the beginning of this fic. (They are. We humans are such fickle creatures.)

Rogue squirms and invents an excuse.

"I left my axe back in the ring." Rogue says as she turns and hurries back.

"You guys go on ahead and I'll catch up with you." Rogue says waving as Remy watches, suspicious.

We cut to the cove later in the day. Rogue rubs Chavonnie behind the ear, causing her to relax and fall over. (I do not do that! *Gets scratched behind the ear and purrs like a cat before collapsing in a heap* Okay maybe I do.)

We cut to the training grounds later in the day. An angry Deadly Spyke approaches Rogue. Just as Remy moves in to strike, Rogue performs her special rubbing technique, which sends the Spyke down. Remy and the other kids look on from the sideline in amazement.

We cut to the main hall where Rogue sits down at a table to eat. The other recruits notice her and move over to her table to talk to her – leaving Remy alone.

"Hey Rogue!" Scott says excitedly.

"What was that? Some kind of trick? What did you do?" Jean asks wanting to know how to do that trick herself.

"Rogue, you're totally going to come in first, there's no question." Pietro says making Rogue sick to her stomach.

We cut to the cove later in the day. Rogue is using a mirror-like object to create a patch of light on the ground. Chavonnie claws and chases the light patch like a cat chasing a laser pointer. (Okay since when am I a cat? _Better than being an Evan. _True.)

We cut to the training grounds the next day. A beam lifts from the door of another dragon pen.

"Meet the Terrible Sabretooth." Forge says as a tiny, pint-sized dragon steps out and moves toward the recruits.

"Ha. It's like the size of my—"Pietro says and is taken down in a blur.

"Get it off! Get it off! Oh! I'm hurt, I am very much hurt!" Pietro screams and Rogue stops the Terrible Sabretooth with the same light-patch trick she used earlier with Chavonnie.

The tiny dragon retreats back to its cage. The teens approach her yet again as Remy looks on with suspicion.

"Wow, she's better than you ever were." Pietro says to Remy only to get an exploding card thrown his way.

We cut to the forest moments later. Remy furiously hurls his axe at a nearby tree. He notices Rogue walking by in the distance, carrying one of her trademark harnesses. He quickly tries to follow, but he loses her in the woods. He huffs, frustrated.

We cut to the cove later in the day. Rogue straps a newly designed harness onto Chavonnie. With Chavonnie tied to a nearby post with a rope. Rogue rides her in the air - while stationary. Chavonnie looks like a giant kite tied to a tree stump. This harness seems to work. We cut to the sky moments later. The rope breaks and the pair crash into a tree. Rogue's face is red.

"Oh, great." Rouge says checking to make sure her nose wasn't broken.

We cut to Berk later that night. The streets are empty save for a lone Viking who crosses Rogue's path.

"Rogue." The Viking says being polite.

Rogue nods, trying to look casual. Once the coast is clear, she covertly steers Chavonnie into the Blacksmith's stall. Chavonnie presses herself inside, rooting through stuff and making a racket. Remy, walking nearby, is alerted.

"Rogue?" Remy asks off screen.

Rogue freezes. Then frantically tries to pry the ring off the saddle hook. It won't budge.

"Are you in there?" Remy asks still off screen and it's too late - he's right outside.

We see Remy walking along the outside of the Blacksmith's. Rogue jumps out the window and closes the shutters behind her. Rogue's harness line is stretched through the window, still attached to Chavonnie' saddle.

"Remy. Hey! Hi Remy. Hi Remy. Hi Remy." Rogue says nervous to be around her crush and for him to find Chavonnie.

"Remy normally don't care what people do, but you're acting weird. Well, weirder." Remy says as Chavonnie spots a nearby sheep and makes a move toward it. (Mmm lamb *licks lips and pulls out a knife and fork from nowhere*.)

As a result, Rogue is suddenly pulled tight against the window shutters. She strikes a pose to compensate... then gets pulled through the shutters. They snap back in Remy's face. Remy reopens them and finds nothing but an empty stall. In the distance, Chavonnie and Rogue slip off unseen.

We cut to the docks at dawn. A lone, battered ship is pulled into a slip, overloaded with equally battered-looking men. They disembark to a crowd of onlookers, looking like a team of hometown heroes who just had their butts kicked. Forge hobbles through the mumbling crowd to find Wolverine - last to disembark and glowering with battered pride.

"Where are the other ships?" A Viking asks getting Mr Grey to shudder. (Eh not as fun to torture parents than it is to torture the actual people.)

"You don't want to know." Mr Grey says and I get the feeling dragons were involved. (No duh. Sometimes I wonder which one of us is the smart one. _Considering the fact that I do all our tests I'm pretty sure it's me. _*muttering* Know-It-All.)

Wolverine lumbers past Forge, leaving him staring at the trashed ship.

"Well, I trust you found the nest at least?" Forge says souring Wolverine's even further.

"Not even close." Wolverine says his tone dark.

"Ah. Excellent." Forge says as he follows Wolverine up the ramp and snags his duffle bag with his hook appendage, sharing the burden.

"I hope you had a little more success than me." Wolverine says sounding as if he could use some good news.

"Well, if by success, you mean that your parenting troubles are over with, then... yes." Forge says and Wolverine stops. What does that mean? A group of merry villagers rush past.

"Congratulations Wolverine! Everyone is so relieved." One Viking that looks like Warren minus the wings says sounding as if he was given the best news ever.

"Out with the old and in with the new, right?!" Another Viking that looks a little like Leech says.

"No one will miss that old nuisance!" Another Viking that looks like Rahne says.

"The village is throwing a party to celebrate!" Another Viking that looks like Sam says.

Wolverine is stunned, overwhelmed by the insensitivity. He turns to Forge.

"She's... gone?" Wolverine asks thinking the worst.

"Yeah...most afternoons. But who can blame her? I mean the life of a celebrity is very rough. She can barely walk through the village without being swarmed by her new fans." Forge says confusing Wolverine even more.

Wolverine is doubly confused.

"Rogue?" Wolverine asks trying to make sense of things.

"Who would've thought, eh? She has this...way with the beasts." Forge says clearing things up.

We cut to the sky in the afternoon. Chavonnie and Rogue soar through a perfect blue sky. Billowing clouds rise like mountains. The ground seems miles below them.

"Okay there bud, we're gonna take this nice and slow." Rogue says as she checks a leather cheat sheet, clipped onto her harness. Inscribed upon it are several tail positions and their pedal position equivalents.

"Here we go. Here we go...position three, no four." Rogue says as she presses the pedal, causing the tail to flare.

They roll off into an arcing bank, gloriously lit by the late afternoon sun. Rogue tucks tight against her neck, thrilled that her new harness and vest are holding. The foot controls make the tail appendage quick and responsive. She watches Chavonnie' every fluctuation, trying to match it with the prosthetic. Rogue sizes up a target - a towering arch of stone, rising from the sea.

"Alright, it's go time. It's go time." Rogue says as they dive toward it, lining up to pass through the arch.

"Come on. Come on buddy. Come on buddy!" Rogue says as they zip through the arch. A perfect maneuver.

"Yeah! Yes, it worked!" Rogue says in joy but the triumph is short-lived.

They smack into one of several sea stacks as Rogue tries to keep up with the turns.

"Sorry." Rogue says as they hurtle into another rock pillar. Chavonnie grumbles.

"My fault." Rogue says as Chavonnie swats her with her 'ear' plate.

"Yeah, yeah, I'm on it." Rogue says and then refers to the cheat sheet.

"Position four, no three." Rogue says as they pierce the clouds. For the first time, Rogue can see the whole of the island below them. It shrinks with every passing second. She swallows hard and tightens her grip on the handles.

"Yeah! Go baby! Yes! Oh, this is amazing! The wind in my..." Rogue says before she spots the leather guide tearing free in the turbulence.

"... CHEAT SHEET! STOP!" Rogue yells panicked as she grabs frantically for the airborne sheet...

"No!" Rogue yells …and nabs it before it's carried out of reach.

Chavonnie, however, obeys the command and suddenly stops beating her wings. As they slow to a stop, Rogue goes weightless. The rings of her vest float off of the harness hooks. Rogue suddenly finds herself detached, free-falling.

"Oh gods! Oh no!" Rogue says and without Rogue, the tail loses control. Rogue and Chavonnie spiral downward. Chavonnie fights to get back under Rogue.

"Alright, okay. You just gotta kinda angle yourself. No, no...come back down towards me. Come back down—"Rogue says trying to calm Chavonnie down.

Rogue extends her arms and legs, giving herself as much surface area as she can. She angles back towards Chavonnie as the tumbling dragon whacks Rogue with her wing. After a few more misses, Rogue finally grabs hold of the harness and manages to lock in - just in time to pull Chavonnie out of her dive... barely shy of the tree tops. They careen past the wooded cliff and directly into a treacherous slalom course of jutting sea stacks. Rogue pulls the cheat sheet from her teeth and attempts to check positions. It flaps violently in the turbulence, making it impossible.

With no time to think, Rogue throws it away and steers Chavonnie' tail on instinct... with perfect intuition. Together, they manage a tight, hair-raising series of split-second turns, making it to the open water, unscathed. Rogue takes a breath and glances back at the death-defying obstacle course, now safely behind them. She beams, relieved. She sits back and throws her arms up in victory.

"YEEAHHH!" Rogue yells happily and Chavonnie concurs with a happy squeal and a fireball.

Rogue's glee turn to dread as they fly directly into it.

"Ah, come on." Rogue shouts as we zoom in on her face.

* * *

We cut to a black sand beach at sunset where Rogue and Chavonnie lounge on the sprawling, deserted beach, snacking of freshly caught fish. As Rogue cooks hers over a fire, Chavonnie suddenly regurgitates a fish head. Rogue smirks with forced politeness.

"Uh… no thanks." Rogue says before gesturing to her fish on a stick and saying, "I'm good."

Several Terrible Sabretooths land like seagulls, hissing and nipping at each other as they approach Chavonnie's pile of fish. One grabs the regurgitated fish head and drags it away. Another attempts to steal it from him. They face off and blast fire balls at each other to settle the fight. Rogue and Chavonnie watch, amused. That is until... Chavonnie spots one of her fish leaving the pile. A stealthy Terrible Sabretooth is exposed as the thief. They tug on the fish, and it snaps back into Chavonnie' mouth. She swallows it back tauntingly.

Irate, the little dragon paws at the ground and blasts Chavonnie. The Sabretooth opens his mouth, the gas hiss comes, and Chavonnie fires a tiny flame straight into its mouth, causing the gas to backfire into the little dragon. It coughs up smoke and staggers away, looking ill. Rogue laughs.

"Not so fireproof on the inside, are you?" Rogue asks before throwing the hapless Sabretooth her freshly cooked fish.

"Here you go." Rogue says as the appreciative little dragon gulps down the meal and approaches Rogue cautiously. He curls up next to her. Rogue is amazed.

"Everything we know about you guys is wrong." Rogue says pensively before carefully petting him... sending the Sabretooth into an immediate, blissful sleep. (Awww can I keep him? *Holds shrunken Sabretooth in her arms* _No. _Why not? _That's why. *Gestures to the thrashing Sabretooth who is trying to rip Chavonnie apart* _Fine. *Puts Sabretooth down*)

We quickly shift back to the blacksmith stall in Rogue's closet late at night. Rogue is lost in thought, her head laid of a desk full of Chavonnie drawings. Burdened with the weight of the world. Suddenly, Wolverine appears in the doorway. Rogue jumps and quickly covers up her desk.

"Dad! You're back!" Rogue says as she skirts the bench, blocking Wolverine's view of Chavonnie, the prosthetic fin, and other drawings.

"Forge's not here, so..." Rogue says as she strikes an awkwardly casual pose, trying to cover up as much as possible.

"I know. I came looking for you." Wolverine says and Rogue's stomach drops.

"You did?" Rogue asks caught and really wishing she could sink into the floor.

"You've been keeping secrets." Wolverine says sternly as Rogue's legs give out. She slides, dragging the table's contents with her.

"I...have?" Rogue squeaks out afraid for Chavonnie's and her health.

"Just how long did you think you could hide it from me?" Wolverine asks as Rogue gets more and more nervous.

"I don't know what you're..." Rogue says in vain.

"Nothing happens on this island without me hearing about it." Wolverine says crossing his arms over his chest.

"Oh?" Rogue asks her voice barely audible.

"So." Wolverine says before waiting a beat and saying, "Let's talk about that dragon."

The blood drains from Rogue's face.

"Oh gods. Dad I'm so sorry. I was going to tell you. I just didn't know how to—"Rogue says as Wolverine starts laughing. Big, booming. Rogue stares, baffled.

"You're not...upset?" Rogue asks confused since she was pretty sure Wolverine would be upset.

"What?! I was hoping for this!" Wolverine says happily. (Wow Wolverine happy? That's a first.)

"Uh...you were?" Rogue asks extremely confused.

"And believe me, it only gets better! Just wait til you spill a Spyke's guts for the first time." Wolverine says as Rogue's elated expression sinks.

"And mount your first Blob head on a spear. What a feeling!" Wolverine says before he laughs and smacks Rogue on the shoulder, sending her into the wall.

"You really had me going there, Stripes. All those years of the worst Viking New York has ever seen! Odin, it was rough. I almost gave up on you!" Wolverine says as Rogue gets back up, grimacing in the irony of it all.

"And all the while, you were holding out on me! Thor almighty!" Wolverine says as he grabs a stool and sits.

"Ahhhhh. With you doing so well in the ring, we finally have something to talk about." Wolverine says leaving a pregnant pause.

Rogue averts her eyes nervously. Wolverine adjusts, awkwardly clearing his throat. After a long, uncomfortable silence...

"Oh, I... brought you something." Wolverine says as he presents a horned helmet.

"To keep you safe in the ring." Wolverine says handing her the helmet.

"Wow. Thanks." Rogue says sincerely as she accepts it, looking it over.

"Your mother would've wanted you to have it. It's half of her breast plate." Wolverine says heartfelt as he taps his own helmet and smiles.

"Matching set. Keeps her close, y'know?" Wolverine says as Rogue eyes the mismatched helmets, grimacing. (She does know it can be adjusted to fit her head right? _I don't think she does. _Oh well I won't be the one to tell her.)

"Wear it proudly. You deserve it. You've held up your end of the deal." Wolverine says as he beams with pride. Rogue squirms. She forces a yawn.

"I should really get to bed." Rogue says trying to escape the awkwardness.

"Yes! Good! Okay. Good talk. See you back at the house. We should do this again. I'm Great. Thanks for stopping glad I stopped by, I hope you by. And for the... the uh, like the hat. breast hat." Wolverine and Rogue say over each other barely understandable.

"Well... uh... good night." Wolverine says as he leaves the room awkwardly, leaving Rogue looking more burdened than ever.


	6. Chapter 6

**Disclaimer: I don't own X-Men Evolution or How to Train Your Dragon.**

* * *

We cut to the training grounds in the afternoon. A Blob hovers above the ring, hunting victims as the teen recruits scramble. Remy ducks behind a barrier to find Rogue already there. He forces his axe at her throat.

"Stay out of Remy's way! Remy's winning this thing." Remy says really wanting to win.

"Please, by all means." Rogue says as Remy darts off, closing fast on the dragon. The crowd above cheers him on.

"You got it Remy!" A Viking in the crowd yells cheering Remy on.

Rogue stands and looks around. Amidst the crowd of onlookers, Wolverine watches keenly, beaming with pride. He locks eyes with Rogue, giving her a nod of encouragement. Rogue adjusts her new helmet and forces a half-hearted smile. Unbeknownst to Rogue, the Blob spots her and makes a bee-line toward her. We zoom back to Remy as he catches his breath behind a barrier. He scowls, focused, determined.

"Dis time. Dis time for sure." Remy says with a fierce battle-cry he leaps from cover, axe cocked to throw.

"Aaaaaaaaaa..." Remy screams and as he clears the barriers, he sees that Rogue has already laid the Blob out.

" ...aaaaaaauGGGGGHHHHHHHH! No! No!" Remy screams obviously upset as Rogue shrugs, as unhappy with the situation as he is.

"NO! NO! DAUGHTER OF HALFTROLL RAT EATING MUNGE BUCKET!" Remy screams as a loud clack rings out.

From the crowd above, Tante Mattie, the village elder, steps forward, tapping her staff. Everyone lights up excitedly.

"Wait! Wait!" Wolverine says excitedly.

"So, later." Rogue says as Forge snags her as she attempts to leave.

"Not so fast." Forge says letting Rogue go.

"I'm kinda late for—"Rogue says a little nervous.

"What? Late for what exactly?" Remy asks livid.

Wolverine holds out his hands to silence the jabbering crowd.

"Okay quiet down. The elder has decided." Wolverine says as Chavonnie sighs in relief since she hated crowds.

Thrilled, Forge stands behind Rogue and Remy. He points to Remy as the crowd waits in silent anticipation. Tante Mattie shakes her head 'no.' The crowd 'Oooohs.' Forge then points to Rogue. The elder nods an affirmative 'yes.' The crowd erupts in cheers. Remy turns a seething, deadly glare on Rogue.

"You've done it! You've done it, Rogue! You get to kill the dragon!" Forge yells happily.

"Ha, ha! That's my girl!" Wolverine yells extra happily as Rogue is hoisted onto the recruits' shoulders and carried out to the cheering spectators...

"Heh, heh. Oh yeah! Yes! I can't wait. I am so..." Rogue says masking panic.

We quickly cut to the hidden cove.

"... leaving. We're leaving. Let's pack up. Looks like you and me are taking a little vacation, forever." Rogue says freaking out while Chavonnie is nowhere in sight.

Rogue sets down her basket and opens it up, her head clouded with troubles.

"Oh..man..." Rogue says as she hears a SHINK!

Rogue looks up to the sound of Remy, sitting on the rock right in front of her, sharpening his axe.

"Aggh! What the—"Rouge says shocked before recomposing and asking, "What are you doing here?"

Remy hops off the rock and back her down, spinning his axe threateningly. Rogue's eyes dart around nervously, searching for Chavonnie.

"Remy wants to know what's going on. No one just gets as good as you do. Especially you. Start talking! Are you training with someone?" Remy asks demanding answers.

"Uh...training?" Rogue asks confused as Remy grabs her by her odd-looking harness.

"It better not involve... this." Remy says a little confused at the harness but more angry.

"I know this looks really bad, but you see...this is, uh..." Rogue says before they hear a rustle coming from the other side of the cove.

Remy drops Rogue to the ground and sets off to investigate.

"You're right! You're right. I'm through with the lies. I've been making... outfits. So you got me. It's time everyone knew. Drag me back. Go ahead. Here we go." Rogue says panicked as she puts Remy's hand back on her harness, getting him to 'drag her back.' Remy bends Rogues hand backwards, driving her down.

"AAAAUUGGGHHH! Why would you do that?!" Rogue asks hurt.

"Dat's for the lies." Remy says before he bounces the hilt of her axe off of Rogue's laid-out body.

"And DAT'S for everything else." Remy says getting a yelp from Rogue.

Rogue's yelp is answered with a growl, coming from the other side of the cove. Remy looks up to see... a very angry Rebel. Chavonnie pounces toward them, snarling.

"Oh man." Rogue says feebly.

Remy dives onto Rogue.

"Get down! Run! Run!" Remy yells as he pulls his axe, ready to take on Chavonnie.

"No!" Rogue yells as she knocks Remy's cocked axe to the ground, out of reach, then stops Chavonnie short of crushing him.

"No. It's okay! It's okay..." Rogue says and Chavonnie pulls up short and lands hard, spraying Remy with sand.

"He's a friend." Rogue says trying to calm Chavonnie down.

Chavonnie snorts in disagreement. Remy is frozen. Chavonnie looks from him to Rogue and back to him, confused.

"You just scared her." Rogue says to Remy.

"Remy scared her!?" Remy shouts as Rogue makes a be quiet motion.

"Who is her?" Remy asks in an intense whisper.

"Remy, Chavonnie. Chavonnie, Remy." Rogue says as Remy backs away, eyeing Rogue and Chavonnie together with pure disgust. He turns and runs for the village.

"We're dead." Rogue says completely afraid for her health.

Satisfied with Remy's departure, Chavonnie turns away.

"Where do you think you're going?" Rogue asks Chavonnie as we shift to the woods moments later.

Remy races through the trees. A large shadow overtakes him. He is suddenly snatched into the air. Remy screams.

"Oh great Odin's ghost, dis is it!" Remy yells as Rogue and Chavonnie fly him to the top of a towering pine. It bows and creaks under their weight as Remy dangles a hundred feet in the air.

"Rogue! Get Remy down from here!" Remy yells trying not to fall down.

"You have to give me a chance to explain." Rogue says as Chavonnie seems to be thinking about roasting Remy alive. (Just for the record I have nothing against Gambit except the whole Acolyte thing it's just part of the movie.)

"Remy's not listening to ANYTHING you have to say!" Remy says slowly losing his grip on the tree.

"Then I won't speak. Just let me show you." Rogue says as she extends a hand much to Chavonnie's annoyance.

"Please, Remy." Rogue says as Remy eyes her and the dragon, then the ground far, far below.

After a moment, he swats Rogue's outstretched hand away and reluctantly climbs over the pedal, lines, and harness. He settles behind Rogue, avoiding as much contact as possible.

"Now get Remy down." Remy says really hating being so high up.

"Chavonnie? Down. Gently." Rogue says as Chavonnie leers mischievously.

She spreads her wings slowly. With a WHOP, they fill with the updraft. Chavonnie releases the tree, tucks in her legs, and hovers in place.

"See? Nothing to be afraid of." Rogue says as Chavonnie suddenly launches straight upward.

Remy screams like a girl. The acceleration is tremendous. Every downbeat bucks the saddle, heaving them into the sky, doubling their speed like a rocket. Remy is thrown backward. He screams and hugs Rogue for dear life, squeezing the breath out of her.

"Chavonnie! What is wrong with you?! Bad dragon!" Rogue shouts at a not at all sorry Chavonnie before telling Remy mortified, "She's not usually like this. Oh no..."

Chavonnie rolls and plummets toward the coastline far below. Remy screams. Chavonnie rockets over the ocean waves, deliberately dipping them in the froth.

"Chavonnie, what are you doing?! We need him to like us!" Rogue shouts but Chavonnie ignores her.

Chavonnie rockets skyward and begins tumbling head over tail.

"And now the spinning. Thank you for nothing you useless reptile." Rogue says as Remy clamps his hand over his eyes.

"Okay! Remy's sorry! Remy's sorry! Just get Remy off of this thing." Remy yells and knows he is defeated, his aggressive energy gone.

Satisfied, Chavonnie relents. They level off and head up into the clouds. Remy opens his eyes again, and looks out over a world he'd never dreamed of. He reaches out and touches clouds, pierces columns ablaze in golden hues, and floats over a vast, alien sky-scape. His terror is replaced by wonder. He grins, despite himself. Chavonnie rises above a blanket of clouds...

We dissolve to the sky at night...and Chavonnie levels off under a starry sky. They emerge from a blanket of clouds under the dancing Northern Lights, shimmering in ribbons across the vast sky. Below them, New York's torches flicker in the inky darkness. The new perspective is breath-taking. Remy tucks his arms into Rogue's vest, burying his chin into her shoulder. The moment is not lost on either of them. Rogue smiles nervously. Chavonnie climbs past New York's tallest peaks and heads out over open water, leaving the village lights behind them.

"Alright Remy admits it. This is pretty cool. It's... amazing." Remy says before waiting a beat and saying, "She's amazing." (Finally someone realises it! Oh wait movie right.)

Remy carefully reaches down and pats Chavonnie' side.

"So what now?" Remy asks getting Rogue to groan. It's a problem without an answer.

"Rogue, your final exam is tomorrow. You know you're going to have to kill..." Remy says before whispering, "... kill a dragon."

"Don't remind me." Rogue says as a strange, unearthly din approaches.

Chavonnie's ear plates suddenly stand on end. Panicked, she abruptly dives, dipping into cloud cover.

"Chavonnie! What's happening? What is it?" Rogue asks as Chavonnie barks at her. 'Quiet!'

Suddenly, out of the dense cloud, a Monstrous Pyro emerges.

"Get down!" Rogue shouts as she and Remy duck. The Pyro calls out. A ShadowCrawler appears to the other side of Chavonnie, boxing her in.

"What's going on?" Remy asks confused.

"I don't know." Rogue says also confused before saying, "Chavonnie. You've got to get us out of here, bud."

Chavonnie hisses. Other dragons, previously invisible in the thick clouds, appear all around them. Hundreds of them, all carrying fish and game in their talons.

"It looks like they're hauling in their kill." Rogue whispers afraid.

The ShadowCrawler eyes them ravenously.

"What does that make us?" Remy asks down right terrified.

The dragons bank and dive in formation, plummeting through the thickening fog and weaving between towering, craggy sea stacks. They emerge at the base of a massive volcanic caldera, glowing with rivulets of lava. The flock of dragons fall into rank, funnelling through a crack, and zipping through a winding tunnel. It gives way to a vast, steamy inner chamber, tiered with pocky shelves. Dragons of all breeds lay about, nested in hordes. The arriving dragons fly in, dropping the fish and game into a central pit, glowing red and shrouded in mist. Rogue is amazed.

"What my dad wouldn't give to find this." Rogue says as Chavonnie peels away from the procession, landing on a small shadowy shelf to keep a low-profile. (I have a fear of crowds. So sue me.)

Rogue and Remy peek around, taking in the busy hive of sorts. They watch as the food continues to be dropped into the pit.

"It's satisfying to know that all of our food has been dumped down a hole." Rogue says sarcastically.

"They're not eating any of it." Remy says confused.

Last to arrive is a dim-witted Blob. It hovers over the pit and regurgitates his paltry contribution - a pathetic little fish. As it falls into the steamy pit, a terrible roar rings out. The Blob tries to flee, but before it can, a gargantuan dragon head juts from the steamy pit and snaps it out of the air. Swallowing it back whole. Rogue and Remy recoil, terrified.

"What is dat?" Remy asks terrified.

The monstrous beast sniffs the air, seemingly aware of them. It nears the ledge where Chavonnie is hiding... and roars. (Ow! Owie! Ow! Ow! Sensitive hearing here!) Several dragons take flight in fear.

"Alright buddy, we gotta get out of here. Now!" Rogue shouts as Chavonnie takes flight, barely evading the monster's snapping jaws.

The behemoth dragon lunges for them, snatching a ShadowCrawler out of the air instead. Chavonnie disappears into the winged exodus as thousands of dragons flee the caldera in fear. We cut to the cove later in the night. Chavonnie glides into the cove and touches down on the moonlit beach.

"No, no, it totally makes sense. It's like a giant beehive. They're the workers... and that's their queen. It controls them." Remy says his mind reeling and talking Rouge's ear off.

He leaps off of Chavonnie and runs toward the village.

"Let's find your dad." Remy says ready to destroy the nest.

"No, no! Not yet. They'll... kill Chavonnie." Rogue says and Chavonnie grins at the love. (You like me! You really like me! *hugs Rogue only to be drained and spring back up* Ha now you have two extra voices in your head!)

"Remy, we have to think this through carefully." Rogue says as Remy eyes her, incredulous.

"Rogue, we just discovered the dragons' nest...the thing we've been after since Vikings first sailed here. And you want to keep it a secret? To protect your pet dragon? Are you serious?" Remy asks but Rogue stands firm, resolute.

"Yes." Rogue says her voice strong as Remy's taken aback.

"Okay." Remy says and then asks, "Then what do we do?"

"Just give me until tomorrow. I'll figure something out." Rogue says as Chavonnie nods at the plan.

"Okay." Remy says nodding at the plan.

Remy punches Rogue in the arm.

"Dat's for kidnapping me." Remy says as Rogue looks to Chavonnie for support.

Chavonnie snorts, dismissive. Remy grabs her. She braces for another hit. He kisses Rogue on the cheek.

"Dat's for, everything else." Remy says and in the awkward wake of the moment, Remy hurries off leaving Rogue rubbing her cheek, stunned.

Chavonnie hobbles up, eyeing her.

"What are you looking at?" Rogue asks as Chavonnie rolls her eyes.

We cut to the training grounds at day time. The grounds have been transformed. Banners and flags flap in the morning sun. Surrounding the ring, a festive crowd had gathered. All of New York has turned out for the event. In the stands a few fights have already broken out.

"Well, I can show my face in public again." Wolverine says to the crowd getting a lot of laughter and applause

"If someone had told me that in a few short weeks, Rogue would go from being, well... Rogue, to placing first in dragon training... I would've tied him to a mast and shipped him off for fear he'd gone mad. Yes! And you know it!" Wolverine says playfully before saying, "But here we are. And no one's more surprised..."

We shift to see Rogue standing at the entrance to the ring, listening, looking burdened.

"... or more proud than I am. Today, my girl becomes a Viking. TODAY, SHE BECOMES ONE OF US!" Wolverine continues as the crowd cheers and roars.

Remy approaches Rogue.

"Be careful with that dragon." Remy says dressed in full armour.

"It's not the dragon I'm worried about." Rogue says referring to the crowd.

"What are you going to do?" Remy asks worried about his chere.

"Put an end to this." Rogue says as Remy eyes her, dubious.

"I have to try." Rogue says before saying, "Remy. If something goes wrong...just make sure they don't find Chavonnie."

"I will. Just promise me it won't go wrong." Remy says grimly but Rogue can't. Forge approaches.

"It's time, Rogue. Knock him dead." Forge says as Rogue puts her helmet on and enters the ring.

We shift to the teens hooting and hollering from the stands.

"Show 'em how it's done, my woman!" Pietro yells with a grin.

Rogue locks eyes with Wolverine. Wolverine nods with a smile. Rogue returns a half-smile. Takes a deep breath. She hoists a shield onto his forearm and selects her weapon from a rack of many - a small dagger.

"Hrmph. I would've gone for the hammer." Wolverine mutters as Rogue turns to face a bolted, heavy door and takes a deep breath.

"I'm ready." Rogue says and the door bolt is raised. The crowd grows quiet...

Wait a second. BOOM! The doors blast open with a stream of sticky fire. Followed by a Monstrous Pyro, coated in flames. It tears out of its cave like an irate bull - as the crowd roars and jeers. It climbs the walls and chain enclosure like a bat, hissing at the provoking crowd and blasting fire. It spots Rogue and descends, leering and licking the flaming drool from its lips. The crowd grows silent, bracing for the big fight. With the Monstrous Pyro's eyes locked upon her, Rogue deliberately drops her shield and dagger stepping away from them. The dragon pauses, confused. We cut to Wolverine, also confused.

"What is she doing?" Wolverine asks himself.

The dragon presses closer, snorting. Rogue extends her open hand. It snarls.

"It's okay. It's okay." Rogue whispers to the angry dragon.

The dragon continues to pace, focused on... Rogue's helmet. Rogue realizes, then reaches up and removes it. Taking a breath to acknowledge the point of no return, she tosses the helmet aside. It hits the ground.

"I'm not one of them." Rogue says and gasps and murmurs race through the crowd.

We zoom in on Wolverine, as all eyes turn to him. He's welling with upset. Rogue avoids Wolverine's glare and remains focused on the Pyro, holding her hand out. It paces around her, calming down.

"Stop the fight." Wolverine says afraid for his daughter's life.

"No. I need you all to see this." Rogue says as the crowd gets restless.

"They're not what we think they are. We don't have to kill them." Rogue says as the Pyro continues to circle around her.

"I SAID STOP THE FIGHT!" Wolverine roars and whacks his hammer against the iron enclosure, rattling the arena with a terrible reverberating clatter.

Spooked, the Pyro snaps at Rogue's outstretched hand. Rogue yelps and springs backward. The spell is broken. The Pyro reacts to Rogue's sudden movements and blasts another stream of fire. Rogue screams and barely dives out of reach. We cut to the cove and zoom in on Chavonnie. Her ear plates shoot up. Panic flares in her eyes. We zip back to the training grounds. Rogue scrambles around the ring. The Pyro pursues, snapping and springing from ground to wall. Wolverine pushes through the crowd, rushing to the doorway.

"Out of my way!" Wolverine yells and people part like the red sea to let him through.

"Rogue!" Remy yells as he wedges his axe under the arena gate and squeezes through.

We cut to the cove where Chavonnie bounds to the cove walls, clawing them in desperation. It seems she's as trapped as before, but with an incredible burst of effort she hooks a claw over the upper lip of the stone wall. We cut back to the training grounds. A narrow stream of fire narrowly avoids Rogue as she continues to dash around the ring, evading the Monstrous Pyro. Desperate, she goes to the weapon rack in an attempt to arm herself, but the Pyro quickly destroys the rack and closes in on her.

We cut back to the cove where Chavonnie tears through the woods, bounding like panther and taking to the air in short bursts. We cut back to the training grounds. Wolverine wrenches the grated door to the arena and jumps through. The Monstrous Pyro is only a few feet behind Rogue. Remy is now in the ring.

"Rogue!" Remy shouts as he picks up a hammer and hurls it at the Monstrous Pyro, hitting it in the head.

It turns its attention to Remy, and begins chasing him. Wolverine raises the arena gate, waving him toward it.

"This way!" Wolverine shouts getting Remy's attention.

Remy makes it through, but the Pyro blasts the doorway, cutting Rogue off. It pounces on her and prepares to finish her off. Suddenly, a terrible roar pierces the din.

"Rebel! Get down!" Forge yells out as Chavonnie bounds over the crowd and blasts a hole through the chain enclosure.

She flies through it and disappears in the boiling smoke. The Vikings rush to railings... in time to see a flurry of wings cutting through the dissipating smoke. Chavonnie and the Pyro tumble into the clear, locked in a toothy, vicious fight. Chavonnie kicks the Pyro off and plants herself between Rogue and it. The Pyro snarls, circling them. Chavonnie lunges and roars... causing the Pyro to relent and back away. To everyone's shock and horror, Rogue gets to her feet and grabs Chavonnie protectively.

"Alright, Chavonnie, go. Get out of here!" Rogue shouts panicked and the crowd is gob-smacked, growing livid.

"Rebel!" Warren Viking yells at that seems to snap the Vikings out of their trance.

Rogue tries to shoo Chavonnie away in vain. Vikings begin pouring clambering through the enclosure and dropping into the ring.

"Go! GO!" Rogue shouts but Chavonnie won't budge.

"Take it alive!" Leech Viking shouts as Wolverine grabs an axe and charges into the arena.

Remy calls out to him, panicked.

"Wolverine no!" Remy shouts trying to save Chavonnie's life. (I feel so loved! *Notices Remy is still fuming over the flame thrower incident* Uh never mind.)

"Dad! No! He won't hurt you!" Rogue says trying to save her dragon.

The other Vikings surround and attack Chavonnie. She tosses them aside like rag dolls, her eyes focused on Wolverine.

"No, don't! You're only making it worse!" Rogue shouts concerned for everyone.

Wolverine raises his hammer as he charges for Chavonnie. Chavonnie ducks and pounces on him. They tumble end over end.

"Chavonnie! STOP!" Rogue shouts as Chavonnie pins Wolverine and inhales. (Ha I pinned Wolverine! Go me! Go me! *Notices angry Wolverine coming at her* Oh no.*Runs and hides in the weapons vault before coming out with a flamethrower, axe and giant can of bugs spray* Say hello to my little friends. *Wolverine runs away yelping like a frightened dog*)

The familiar hiss of gas builds. Everyone braces...

"NO!" Rogue shouts and Chavonnie swallows back the blast and turns to Rogue, not understanding.

"Get her!" A Viking that looks like Evan shouts as the crowd rushes her, piling on, and taking Chavonnie down.

Remy holds Rogue back.

"No! Please...just don't hurt her. Please don't hurt her." Rogue shouts desperate to save Chavonnie.

Wolverine gets to his feet, fuming, shaken. A Viking presents Wolverine with an axe. He eyes Chavonnie a moment and then pushes the axe back into the Viking's hands.

"Put it with the others!" Wolverine says as his burning glare turns to Rogue.

We shift to the great hall later in the day and zoom in on Rogue being shoved into the dank, dimmed hall. SLAM! The massive doors rattle and echo. Wolverine pushes past her. He paces against a backdrop of shadowy tapestries and carved pillars - a legacy of heroes, all peering down in angered judgement.

"I should have known. I should have seen the signs." Wolverine says still pacing.

"Dad." Rogue says trying to explain things.

"We had a deal!" Wolverine bellows and pauses to say something, but stops short.

He snorts and resumes pacing, repeating the cycle.

"I know we did... but that was before... ughh, it's all so messed up." Rogue says flustered at having to explain herself.

"So everything in the ring. A trick? A lie?" Wolverine asks as he stomps toward Rogue. Stops short and points, fighting back words.

"I screwed up. I should have told you before now. Take this out on me, be mad at me, but please... just don't hurt Chavonnie." Rogue says more concerned for her dragon that for herself.

"The dragon? That's what you're worried about? Not the people you almost killed?!" Wolverine bellows and everyone with sensitive hearing cringes at the volume.

"She was just protecting me! She's not dangerous." Rogue says defending her dragon.

"They've killed HUNDREDS OF US!" Wolverine yells and I'm starting to think that we have a screaming match on our hands. (Thanks for the warning. *Puts on noise cancelling headphones*)

"And we've killed THOUSANDS OF THEM! They defend themselves, that's all! They raid us because they have to! If they don't bring enough food back, they'll be eaten themselves." Rouge yells making a very good point before saying, "There's something else on their island dad...it's a dragon like—"

Wolverine huffs.

"-Their island?" Wolverine asks as he stomps back... pointing an accusing finger.

"So you've been to the nest." Wolverine says wanting to get as much info as he can.

"Did I say nest?" Rogue asks before she goes silent - she said too much.

"How did you find it?!" Wolverine yells wanting to slay every dragon on that island with his claws.

"No... I didn't. Chavonnie did. Only a dragon can find the island." Rogue says not wanting any more dragons to die.

Wolverine glares. A moment passes and then an idea takes form on his face. His eyes flare. Rogue watches, realizing. Wolverine stomps toward the doorway.

"Oh no. No, Dad. No." Rogue says as she chases after him, panicked.

"Dad. It's not what you think. You don't know what you're up against. It's like nothing you've ever seen." Rogue says as she grabs Wolverine by the arm, tugging with all her might. She has no effect whatsoever.

"Dad. Please. I promise you that you can't win this one." Rogue says getting nothing in response.

"No. Dad. No. For once in your life, WOULD YOU PLEASE JUST LISTEN TO ME?!" Rogue yells as Wolverine throws her off of him, swatting her to the floor.

Icy stillness. Rogue stares back, stunned.

"You've thrown your lot in with them. You're not a Viking." Wolverine says icily before saying, "You're not my daughter."

Wolverine pushes through the door, leaving Rogue alone, devastated.

"Ready the ships!" Wolverine calls out as we shift to the outside of the great hall. (I HATE THIS PART *Burst out crying* THIS IS TOO CLOSE FOR COMFORT!)

Wolverine staggers on the steps, breaking inside. We cut to the docks that same day. Broken-down catapults and trebuchets are bundled up and lowered from the cliffs. Below on the docks, Vikings load the heavy artillery into the hulls of awaiting ships. Children and the elderly gather to on the walkways to wave apprehensive farewells to the departing warriors. Lastly, Chavonnie is loaded aboard Wolverine's ship, chained down to a palette, muzzled, and restrained with a weighty neck ring. She looks exhausted, miserable. (You would be too if you were allergic to metal and had to wear that thing.)

Wolverine crosses to the bow as the ship pushes off and joins the amassed armada of ships adrift in the harbour. Wolverine's brow is furrowed, all warmth drained away. He turns west and glares at the horizon with cold determination.

"Set sail! We head for Helheim's Gate." Wolverine bellows and he then notices Rogue watching from his familiar cliff-side perch beyond the village.

Their eyes meet, full of hurt and regret. Rogue slowly shakes her head in warning. Wolverine breaks the stare and turns to Chavonnie, fuming.

"Lead us home, Devil." Wolverine says getting a growl from Chavonnie.

We zoom in on Rogue watching. She's powerless to stop what is happening, but won't leave.

We dissolve to the cliffs later in the day still on Rogue who is still standing there. The ships have cleared the horizon. We crane up to reveal Remy is standing behind her. He approaches cautiously and stands beside her in silence.

"It's a mess." Remy says but Rogue doesn't respond.

"You must feel horrible. You've lost everything. Your father, your tribe, your best friend." Remy says probably speaking from experience.

"Thank you for summing that up." Rogue says glumly.

"Why couldn't I have killed that dragon when I found her in the woods. It would have been better for everyone." Rogue says and I'm pretty sure Chavonnie disagrees. (I do. I happen to like living thank you very much!)

"Yep. The rest of us would have done it." Remy says before asking, "So why didn't you?"

Rogue just shakes her head - she really doesn't know. Remy's eyes glimmer. He wants something.

"Why didn't you?" Remy asks hoping to get some answers.

"I don't know. I couldn't." Rogue says not understanding why Remy was pursing the subject.

"That's not an answer." Remy says with a half-smile.

"Why is this so important to you all of a sudden?" Rogue asks irritated with all of Remy's questions.

"Because Remy want to remember what you say right now." Remy says really getting on Rogue's nerves.

"Oh for the love of - I was a coward! I was weak. I wouldn't kill a dragon." Rouge yells angrily and loudly.

"You said 'wouldn't' that time." Remy says spotting the slight change.

"Whatever! I wouldn't! Three hundred years and I'm the first Viking who wouldn't kill a dragon!" Rogue yells as she blows up at Remy.

Everything is silent for a moment.

"First to ride one, though." Remy says putting things in perspective.

Rogue blinks. She never looked at it that way before.

"So..." Remy says hoping that Rogue was catching on.

"...I wouldn't kill her because she looked as frightened as I was." Rogue says realising before saying, "I looked at her and I saw myself."

Remy turns to face the open sea.

"Remy bets she's really frightened now." Remy says before provoking Rogue by saying, "What are you going to do about it?"

Silence again.

"Probably something stupid." Rogue says a plan forming in her mind.

"Good. But you've already done that." Remy says and silence falls again.

"Then something crazy." Rogue says the plan fully formed in her mind.

Remy smiles.

"Dat's more like it." Remy says glad that they were going to do something.


	7. Chapter 7

**Disclaimer: I don't own X-Men Evolution or How To Train Your Dragon.**

* * *

We cut to the open sea outside Dragon Island. The armada coasts toward a shroud of heavy fog, hung like drapes from a low-hanging, ominous sky. The ships enter, one by one. Visibility drops immediately. Flanking ships becomes ghosts. The armada disappears, drawn into the blinding mist. Complete whiteout. Nothing remains but the eerie creaking of wood on water. We zoom in on Wolverine at the bow of his ship. He taps his fingers on the gunwale, then looks back at Chavonnie impatiently. Weighed down with chains, Chavonnie seems unresponsive.

"Sound your positions. Stay within earshot." Wolverine says and shouts pour in from all directions.

"Here." Bobby shouts nearby them.

"One length to your stern." Jubilee shouts nearby Bobby.

"On your starboard flank." Warren shouts to the right of Wolverine.

"Three widths to port." Leech shouts to the left of Wolverine.

"Ahead, at your bow." Jamie shouts from behind of Wolverine.

"Haven't a clue." A Viking that sounds a lot like Tony Stark yells completely lost. (And that my friends is a celebrity cameo. _You mean like when Stan Lee appeared in X-Men the first movie. _Precisely.)

We zoom back in on Wolverine straining into the fog as the calls continue. Massive, jagged sea stacks begin to emerge, threatening to rip the ships to shreds. Forge approaches him, speaking under his breath.

"Listen... Logan... I was overhearing some of the men just now and, well, some of them are wondering what it is we're up to here - not me of course, I know you're always the man with the plan - but some, not me, are wondering if there is in fact a plan at all, what it might be?" Forge asks not wanting to set Wolverine off.

"Find the nest and take it." Wolverine says simply.

"Ah. Of course. Send them running. The old Viking fall-back. Nice and simple." Forge says worried about the rest of his body parts.

"Shhh." Wolverine says as he notices that Chavonnie' ear plates are at the alert, quietly reacting to inaudible sounds.

Wolverine crosses to the stern of the ship and grabs the tiller, moving the helmsman out of the way.

"Step aside." Wolverine says as he pulls the ship into a turn, covertly following Chavonnie' head movements.

The ship barely misses a jagged outcrop that suddenly appears out of the soupy fog.

"Bear to port." A Viking yells as the order is called out from ship to ship.

CRUNCH! The bow barely makes it past another sea stack. Wolverine continues to follow Chavonnie' cues, undeterred. We shift back to the training grounds. Rogue raises the bolt on the Monstrous Pyro's pen.

"If you're planning on getting eaten, I'd definitely go with the Blob." Scott says off screen.

Rogue turns to see her fellow recruits, watching him with folded arms. Pietro steps forward with a scowl.

"You were wise to seek help from the world's most deadly weapon." Pietro says before noticing Rogue's confused look and saying, "It's me."

"Uh..." Rogue says trying to figure out what to say.

"I love this plan." Jean says referring to the Rogue being eaten plan. (_We can't take much more captain. *Holds the doors closed with all their strength* _I know. Time for a little diversion. *Throws some pictures of Rogue and Remy kissing as well as a few of Jean and Scott kissing out the door and the creaking seems to stop* That should hold them till the end of the parody. _I sure hope so._)

"I didn't..." Rogue says thinking she found the right words.

"You're crazy." Wanda says as if stating the obvious.

"So? What is the plan?" Remy asks and Rogue smiles, glowing in the support of his friends.

We cut to the foggy seas that same day. The ships follow in line through the gauntlet of rocks as orders are whispered from ship to ship. A dragon head looms out of the fog. The men recoil... only to discover that it's a wrecked ship, impaled high on a gnarled sea stack.

"Ah. I was wondering where that went." Forge says as a clicking buzz becomes audible, growing louder.

It fills the sky, converging in one general direction. Wolverine sniffs the air.

"Stay low and ready your weapons." Wolverine orders as his ship suddenly jerks to a halt as the keel burrows into shallow black sand.

Wolverine hops overboard, landing on a sprawling beach. The buzzing suddenly stops. Above him, a craggy volcano towers into the gloom.

"We're here." Wolverine says as behind him, several dragon-headed bows pierce the fog.

We cut to the training grounds. Rogue steps back from the door, drawing the Monstrous Pyro out of its cave. It snorts, stepping into the ring, calmed by Rogue's outstretched hand - focused on her.

We zoom in on the teens... bewildered, in awe. Jean nervously reaches for a spear lying near her foot. Remy stops her.

"Uh-uh." Remy says correcting her.

Rogue slows to a stop in front of the teens, with the Pyro inches from her outstretched hand. She reaches over and grabs Jean's trembling hand.

"Wait! What are you..." Jean says nervously.

"Relax. It's okay... it's okay." Rogue says as she replaces her outstretched hand with Jean's, putting her in control of the massive beast.

The Pyro snorts, but remains calm. Jean, by contrast, chuckles nervously - it's at once terrifying and amazing. The others watch, spellbound. Rogue turns and walks away.

"Where are you going?!" Jean asks as Rogue pulls a bundle of rope from a supply box.

"You're going to need something to help you hold on." Rogue says as the teens eye each other apprehensively, and look up to reveal...

All the dragons standing in the ring, facing the teens expectantly.

* * *

Back at the Dragon Island we zoom in on tree trunks, being sharpened and planted into the sand at angled rows. Boulders being loaded into catapult baskets. And a war plan being scratched in the sand. Wolverine looms over it, looking determined. His generals are at his sides.

"When we crack this mountain open, all hell is going to break loose." Wolverine says and I'm shocked at what they can get away with in kid's movies these days.

"In my undies. Good thing I brought extras." Forge says getting a few cheap laughs.

Wolverine turns to face the men.

"No matter how this ends, it ends today." Wolverine says determinedly.

He walks toward the base of the volcano wall, back by several hundred warriors. He raises his arm and drops it. A line of catapults unleash their two-ton loads into the cliff wall. It cracks and flakes away. Several more hits tear away at the hollow shell of hardened lava. A final boulder shatters the fractured wall, creating a deep, dark opening to the cavern within. Silence. Wolverine raises his hand, makes a gesture. A flaming bushel is launched into the dark, lighting the wall... choked with dragons. Wolverine pulls his hammer and rushes into the cave, brazen.

Wolverine releases a war cry with slashing efforts. In a chaotic flurry, the dragons suddenly rush out like bats from a cave. The take to the air, bypassing the axe-swinging Vikings and fleeing the island in a mass exodus. The battle-ready Vikings drop their weapons, confused.

"Is that it?" Forge asks as above the island, dragons pour from every crevice, fleeing to the sky. The sound of screeching dragons fades.

The Vikings cheer as one.

"We've done it!" Mr Grey cheers but Wolverine doesn't celebrate.

Something is not right. He hears something. Wolverine turns to peer down the dark throat of the cavern. A deep, rumbling roar echoes from the cavern. The ground underfoot trembles. The ships rock. Their sails fill with a blast of air. The cheering stops. Wolverine's expression sinks.

"This isn't over. Form your ranks! Hold together!" Wolverine orders as the men scramble to organize themselves.

"Get clear!" Wolverine orders as the ground cracks.

Stone tears away, cascading like an avalanche. And through the settling debris, the silhouette of a gargantuan dragon emerges - THE DEADPOOL. Stirred and furious. (I stand by my choices.)

"Beard of Thor...what is that?" Forge asks as we hear some gleeful chuckling. (I just had too.)

"Odin help us." Wolverine says aghast before saying, "Catapults!"

The Vikings score direct hits. The burning stones bounce off the dragon's skin. The Deadpool focuses on the catapults. It crushes the first one - smashing it and its crew, rattling the beach underfoot. Wolverine races toward the second catapult. He leaps and pushes a Viking out of the way just before the dragon crushes him under his forepaw. The Vikings scramble in all directions.

"Get to the ships!" Warren yells upset that Chavonnie took his wings.

"No! NO!" Wolverine orders as the Deadpool blasts the ships like a mile-long flamethrower. (_Something tells me I just gave you an idea. _Yup. Hey Pyro want to help me build a really big flamethrower? *Pyro nods and they rush off to build the flamethrower*)

The sails are torched. Vikings dive overboard and masts come down. Forge joins Wolverine.

"Heh. Smart, that one." Forge says as Wolverine looks up and down the beach for an answer.

"I was a fool." Wolverine says guilt-ridden and mentally beating himself up for not listening to Rogue.

The monster raises its head to the sky and bellows. The sound shakes the beach, knocking Vikings off their feet. This island is his. Wolverine stops a Viking General.

"Lead the men to the far side of the island." Wolverine orders and Mr Grey nods.

"Right." Mr Grey says before turning to the others and saying, "Everybody to the far side of the island!"

The Vikings scatter into the rocks like ants. Satisfied with the ships destruction, The Deadpool turns its attention back to the Vikings. They seem to have vanished. It sniffs the air, searching for their scent. Forge drops in beside Wolverine, like two soldiers in a trench. Fire blasts overhead, causing them to duck.

"Forge, go with the men." Wolverine orders since he was more than likely to survive.

"I think I'll stay, just in case you're thinking of doing something crazy." Forge says and Wolverine grabs him.

"I can buy them a few minutes if I give that thing someone to hunt." Wolverine says empathetically as Forge removes his hand.

He clenches Wolverine's forearm, determined.

"Then I can double that time." Forge says and Wolverine grins.

Friends to the bitter end. They break cover and dash into the open, splitting up. Wolverine rips a sharpened post from the ground and hurls it into the monster's face.

"HERE!" Wolverine yells trying to get the monster's attention.

"NO, HERE!" Forge yells trying to grabs the monster's attention as well.

It spots both of them. He fuels up to fire, glancing back and forth between the two men. He focuses on Wolverine.

"Come on! Fight me!" Forge shouts trying to draw attention to him.

"No, me!" Wolverine yells trying to save Forge.

The Deadpool remains focused on Wolverine - this is it. It rears back and inhales. Gas begins to amass, when... KABLAM! A blast explodes against the back of The Deadpool's head. It turns distracted, as... a Spyke punches through the flames, banking across the sky. Followed by a Monstrous Pyro, a ShadowCrawler, and a Blob. They roll in unison, revealing the recruits riding on their backs. Rogue leads, with Remy clinging to her waist. Forge and Wolverine, watch slack-jawed, in awe.

"Wanda, Pietro, watch your backs! Move Scott!" Rogue orders as the monster shakes off the blast and snaps in their wake.

Rogue directs her squadron out of harm's way. They climb out of reach and circle each other.

"Look at us, we're on a dragon! We're on dragons, all of us!" Pietro shouts happily riding on the blue head. (I'm sure Kurt just loves that. *Blocks tail trying to spear throat* Nice try but no.)

"Up, let's move it!" Rogue orders and the dragons climb past the Deadpool.

On the ground Forge hobbles over to Wolverine.

"Every bit the boar-headed, stubborn Viking you ever were." Forge says and Wolverine is speechless.

In the air the group circles over the dragon's head.

"Scott, break it down." Rogue orders finally finding a use for Scott. (I mainly use him as a punching bag. _Really cause I often use him for target practice._)

"Okay. Heavily armoured skull and tail made for bashing and crushing. Steer clear of both. Small eyes, large nostrils. Relies on hearing and smell." Scott says doing a quick evaluation of the dragon.

"Okay. Jean, Scott, hang in its blind spot. Make some noise, keep it confused. Wanda, Pietro, find out if it has a shot limit. Make it mad." Rogue says and everyone smiles at their jobs.

"That's my specialty." Wanda says with a wide grin.

"Since when? Everyone knows I'm more irritating. See." Pietro says before making some irritating noises. (Only a little while left. *Holds scissors to rope with evil chuckle*)

"Just do what I told you. I'll be back as soon as I can." Rogue says exasperated considering draining them dry.

"Don't worry, we got it covered!" Pietro says with a salute.

"Yeah!" Scott says as Rogue and Remy peel away.

The teens bank and dive toward the monster, splitting up. The Twins race alongside the monster's head, taunting it.

"Troll!" Pietro insults and he is very lucky he isn't saying that to Chavonnie.

"Butt Elf!" Wanda insults and it's hard to tell whether she's insulting the dragon or Pietro.

"Bride of Grendel!" Pietro insults and the dragon has had enough.

The Deadpool unloads a spray of fire at the twins. They barely dodge it. Scott and Jean hang behind its eyes, banging away at their shields, making a racket. The Deadpool opens all SIX of its eyes, spotting them.

"Uh, this thing doesn't have a blind spot." Scott says afraid for his life.

Rogue and Remy are searching for Chavonnie. Rogue spots her among the burning ships.

"There!" Rogue shout pointing at Chavonnie.

She steers the Spyke over the deck and hands Remy the reins. She lines up her jump... and hops off, guarding her face from the flames. She lands on the burning deck.

"Go help the others!" Rogue yells to Remy.

He and the Spyke take off. As Rogue fights her way to Chavonnie. She unbuckles the muzzle. Chavonnie shrieks.

"Okay, hold on. Hold on." Rogue says as she gets to work on the chains.

We shift to Jean and Scott as they clang their weapons against their shields, making the monster wince.

"It's working." Jean says as the huge beast starts to sway its head dizzily.

"Yeah! It's working." Scott says and we pan down to reveal that the noise is also confusing the Blob and the Monstrous Pyro.

Both dragons lose their bearings. The Deadpool thrashes, knocking Jean off of her dragon and onto the monster's gigantic head. Jean bounces across the top and comes to a stop just shy of the hundred foot drop.

"Agghh!" Jean yells as Scott's Blob goes down in a spin of confusion.

"I've lost power on the Blob. Jean! Do something!" Scott says as he hurls Jean his hammer.

The Blob crashes and skids to a stop...

"I'm okay!" Scott shouts.

... then flips over, crushing Scott.

"Less okay." Scott says feebly. (I love this part *rewinds footage again and again laughing like Pyro the entire time* _Well at least that'll occupy her for a while.)_

We zip back to Jean who eyes the Deadpool's gigantic, veiny eyes. She raises the hammer...

"I can't miss!" Jean says nervously.

... and hammers the monster's eyes, playing whack-a-mole.

"What's wrong buddy, got something in your eye?" Jean asks as Remy flies by on his Spyke, catching Jean in all her heroics.

"Yeah! You're the Viking!" Remy shouts cheering Jean on.

Jean grins, finally vindicated in his eyes. In her distraction, she gets thrown and lands heavily on one of the Deadpool's spines - clinging precariously. A close call. (Drat missed.)

"Whoa!" Jean shouts trying not to fall off.

Back on the ground, the monster's tail sweeps across the burning ships, snapping masts like twigs. We follow one down as it crashes onto a deck, revealing Rogue working at the chains. She can't budge them. Fire licks at her clothes. She looks up to see the Deadpool blasting at the teens, enraged. The monster's giant foot crashes through frame, smashing the bow under its impressive weight. Rogue and Chavonnie are thrown into the water in a maelstrom of burning planks and rigging.

Underwater Rogue swims toward Chavonnie. They're both caught in a mess of rigging, being dragged down. The heavy palette settles into the rocky bottom like an anchor. Chavonnie has stopped struggling. Rogue takes one more hopeless tug at the chains – she's almost out of air. Suddenly, a meaty hand grabs Rogue. Wolverine explodes to the surface, pulling Rogue to the shoreline through flaming debris. He lays her down, under the shelter of an overhanging rock.

"Dad..." Rogue says overwhelmed.

Wolverine dives back into the water between flaming flotsam. Underwater we see Chavonnie, drowning. Wolverine appears in front of her. Chavonnie freezes. Wolverine tears the chains off of the yoke and lets it float free. Momentary stillness. They eye each other, through the churned up bubbles. Chavonnie lunges out of the bars – grabbing Wolverine. BOOM! In an explosion of sea water, Chavonnie lands on the shore, setting Wolverine down and releasing him. Rogue is awed. The ground rumbles underfoot. The monster screeches. Its massive claws stomp around in the smoke. Wolverine gives way as Chavonnie mounts the rock and raises her wings. She turns to Rogue and snorts 'Let's go.'

"You got it, bud." Rogue says as she climbs onto Chavonnie and buckles herself in.

Wolverine grabs her arm.

"Rogue. I'm sorry...for everything." Wolverine says sounding really sorry.

"Yeah...me too." Rogue says with a small smile.

"You don't have to go up there." Wolverine says trying to talk her out of going.

"We're Vikings. It's an occupational hazard." Rogue says and they exchange smiles.

"I'm proud to call you my daughter." Wolverine says and Rogue beams, taken aback.

"Thanks dad." Rogue says looking like she wanted to hug the cranky mutant. (Trust me bad idea. *goes back to watching the footage*)

Wolverine lets go of Rogue's arm. Rogue spurs Chavonnie on, charged with her father's belief in her. They rocket into the sky as Wolverine watches. In the air Remy sees Chavonnie streaking through the sky, gaining altitude.

"She's up!" Remy says before he turns to Wanda and Pietro, who are arguing and throwing punches at each other.

"Get Jean out of there!" Remy orders.

In mid-punch, the twins look over to see Jean stranded on the monster's head. They eye each other.

"I'm on it! I'm on it!" They say at the same time.

"I'm on it first! I'm ahead of you." Pietro says as the twins spot Jean on the giant dragon and steer their ShadowCrawler in her direction.

"Hey! Let me drive!" Wanda yells and the twins peel off, arguing as they race each other to the monster.

Jean sees the ShadowCrawler diving toward her and dashes down the Deadpool's head. She runs up the end of its horn... As the twins sweep past, both missing her... but perfectly snatching her where the necks merge. Wanda and Pietro eye each other, surprised and impressed.

"I can't believe that worked." Pietro says and frankly I'm surprised too.

The Deadpool spots Remy and inhales, preparing to blast. He and his Spyke get caught in the suction, pulled toward the monster's gaping mouth. On the ground the Vikings watch with dread. They hear the familiar whir of the...

"Rebel! Get down!" Forge yells and everyone dives for cover.

In the air a massive blast jolts the Deadpool's head sideways. Remy is thrown clear of its mouth and his Spyke. He tumbles through the air. The ground races toward him, when he's suddenly caught by the leg. He looks up to see Chavonnie.

"Did you get him?" Rogue asks hoping the answer was yes.

Chavonnie grunts in response. On the ground they fly over the crowd of Vikings and set Remy down, mid-run. They circle back to reengage - a black speck against the clouds.

"Go." Remy says breathless.

In the air Rogue and Chavonnie rocket past the Deadpool's head and climb, higher and higher.

"That thing has wings! Okay, let's see if it can use them!" Rogue says to Chavonnie.

Rogue pulls Chavonnie into a turn. They plummet, gaining tremendous speed. The wind buffets them as they target the Deadpool as supersonic speed. KABLAM! Chavonnie unloads a fireball against the Deadpool's head. It goes down with a rumble as they climb anew. (What am I? Related to Pietro? *Shudders at the thought and goes back to watching the footage of Scott and Jean getting hurt*) on the ground the Vikings shield themselves from the dust of the fallen monster... as its wings unfold and extend. In the air Rogue looks back as they put distance between them.

"Do you think that did it?" Rogue asks Chavonnie.

Suddenly, the enraged behemoth rises into frame... flapping its wings furiously. A daunting sight.

"Well, he can fly." Rogue says as she and Chavonnie dive into the tangled sea stacks – they weave through the rock like rabbits through a briar.

The Deadpool snaps at them, but cannot reach them. Rogue and Chavonnie pull ahead. The Deadpool smashes through the canopy of rock and pulls in behind Chavonnie. He bursts through fifty-foot formations like they were saplings. On the ground Wolverine, Forge, and the Teens watch as Rogue and Chavonnie streak past, weaving through sea stacks.

"Woohoo! Yeah!" The teens cheer raising Rogue and Chavonnie's spirits.

A moment later the Deadpool smashes the sea stacks to dust in hot pursuit. The Vikings mood is quenched. In the air Rogue and Chavonnie can't slow the monster down. Rogue eyes the clouds above. An idea hits her. She locks eyes with Chavonnie.

"Okay Chavonnie, time to disappear." Rogue says and Chavonnie nods.

Chavonnie pulls into a steep climb, heading toward the clouds.

"Come on bud!" Rogue says encouragingly.

The Deadpool follows, closing in fast.

"Here it comes!" Rogue says hearing the gas.

BLAST! They narrowly dodge a column of flame and smoke. They reach the low-hanging clouds and pierce them. The monster follows, immediately losing them in the hampered visibility. It roars irritably. From out of nowhere, Chavonnie dives at the huge dragon, blasting and puncturing a hole in its wing. Chavonnie and Rogue are gone again before the dragon can get a shot at them. On the ground the Vikings stare up at the sky listening to the resounding booms and watching flashes light up the clouds. Forge places a hand on Wolverine's shoulder.

In the air Rogue and Chavonnie dive in again and again, using the clouds to hide and surprise as they puncture the monster's wings. It bellows in frustration and whirls around, unleashing fire blindly, in all directions. Rogue sees the glow of fire cutting towards them.

"Watch out!" Rogue yells but it's too late.

The random blast clips Chavonnie's tail. It's heavily damaged.

"Okay, time's up. Let's see if this works." Rogue says as she pulls Chavonnie into a turn.

They fly directly into the Deadpool's face, taunting it.

"Come on! Is that the best you can do!?" Rogue asks and Chavonnie utters an insult too, and they jack-knife into a steep dive. The Deadpool pursues.

Chavonnie pumps her wings, racing faster than she's ever gone before. Rogue and Chavonnie stay just ahead of the Deadpool - no longer trying to evade it. Rogue glances back to check the tail - it's disintegrating.

"Stay with me buddy. We're good. Just a little bit longer." Rogue says her voice stressed.

The Deadpool closes the gap. Rogue tucks in and holds Chavonnie steady - allowing the monster to set its sights on them. It narrows its eyes.

"Hold, Chavonnie." Rogue says and Chavonnie seems to brace for impact.

The Deadpool opens his mouth. The familiar gas hiss emanates from his throat - ignition is coming.

"NOW!" Rogue yells and she hits the pedals hard as Chavonnie extends one wing.

They pivot in place, hurtling directly into the Deadpool's mouth. Chavonnie fires point blank down the monster's throat. Its amassing gas is ignited, backfiring into the monster, erupting in a chain of blasts throughout its body. Rogue and Chavonnie burst from the clouds, the Deadpool hot on their tail, exploding from within. It glances forward and sees the ground rushing up. It throws open its wings, attempting to put on the brakes, but the punctured, damaged wings can't stop its momentum.

As the Deadpool chokes on the expanding fireball, he sees Chavonnie suddenly pull out of the dive, streaking up, past its head. The Deadpool hits the ground, head-first. It explodes like the Hindenburg. Rogue and Chavonnie weave through the monster's massive back plates, wings, and flailing legs - a high-speed recall of the free fall slalom run.

The expanding fireball races toward them, about to swallow them. They manage to clear the obstacles. Rogue glances back. They're outrunning the fireball. She looks forward just in time to see the monster's massive club tail careening toward them. She tries to shift their direction. The last shreds of Chavonnie' tail tear away. Rogue's pedals go dead.

"No. No." Rogue yells afraid for her life.

Rogue and Chavonnie can't maneuver - they're dead in the air. The giant club tail clips Chavonnie, tearing Rogue from the harness and sending her tumbling against the backdrop of the fast-approaching fireball. Chavonnie struggles with all her might to reach the unconscious Rogue. But the fireball swallows them both. On the ground the Vikings watch in horror as Rogue and Chavonnie disappear into the boiling inferno. We dissolve to a whiteout of ash. And through it comes...

"Rogue? Rogue!?" Wolverine calls out as he appears, searching desperately.

Everything is scorched. Even the ground is smoking from the terrible heat.

"Rogue!? Stripes!?" Wolverine calls out worriedly.

Through the ash, Wolverine the motionless silhouette of Chavonnie.

"Rogue." Wolverine says gravely.

He hurries to the dragon's side. Chavonnie is roughed up, but conscious. Her scorched saddle, however, is vacant. Wolverine looks to the sky in despair. He buckles at the knees, overwhelmed by the loss. (Tough little devil aren't I?)

"Oh Stripes...I did this..." Wolverine says as Remy pushes through the crowd, his eyes welling up.

Followed by Forge. They flank Wolverine as he kneels, slumped over. Behind them, a ring of Vikings form, keeping a respectful distance. As the dust and smoke clear, a ring of wild dragons can also be seen, gathering just behind and between the Vikings. Chavonnie stirs and groggily rolls her head toward Wolverine. Their eyes meet.

"I'm so sorry..." Wolverine says right before Chavonnie unfolds her wings, revealing Rogue, unconscious, clutched safely against her chest. Wolverine's eyes widen.

"Rogue." Wolverine says as he scoops Rogue into his arms. Listens to her heart. Bursts into relieved laughter.

"She's alive!" Wolverine calls out relieved before saying to Chavonnie, "You brought her back alive!"

The crowd roars. Followed by the dragons. The Vikings look around to find themselves surrounded. Wolverine leans close to Chavonnie, meeting her eye to eye.

"Thank you... for saving my daughter." Wolverine says privately as Forge looks Rogue up and down.

"Well, you know... most of her." Forge says noticing something was missing.

Wolverine glances back at him. Forge shrugs, redirecting his eyes toward...

* * *

At Wolverine's house we zoom in on Rogue, asleep, her head on a pillow. Healing scars on her face show that maybe a week or two have passed. Chavonnie hovers over her, whining and grumbling impatiently. Rogue stirs. Opens her eyes.

"Oh, hey Chavonnie." Rogue says her voice and head foggy.

Chavonnie excitedly nuzzles and nudges Rogue.

"Okay, okay! I'm happy to see you too, bud. Now just—"Rogue says as Chavonnie steps on thigh, causing Rogue to sit bolt upright with a yelp.

She looks around, confounded. She's in her bed, moved beside the fire pit on the main floor of his house.

"I'm in my house." Rogue says before referring to Chavonnie, who was leaning over her excited, by saying, "You're in my house."

Chavonnie tears around the room, knocking things over, far too big for the space.

"Uh...does my dad know you're in here?!" Rogue asks momentarily forgetting about the battle.

Chavonnie pauses at the foot of the bed, tongue wagging. She eyes the rafters... and leaps up onto them, brimming with 'happy dog' energy. (Great first I was a cat now I'm a dog. _Still beats being an Evan or a Jean or a Scott. _True.)

"Okay, okay - no Chavonnie! Aw, come on..." Rogue says distressed as she shifts to get out of bed... then pauses... sensing that something is wrong.

She peels back the covers slowly. What she sees startles, horrifies, and overwhelms her - all at once. On the bare floor her booted foot touches down. Followed by a mechanical prosthetic in place of her second leg. It's an ingenious spring-loaded replacement, made of wood and iron. Chavonnie lands by the bed and approaches calmly, sniffing the new leg. She raises her eyes to meet Rogue's; seemingly aware of what Rogue is going through. Rogue braces herself on the bedpost and tries to stand on it. She winces and stifles the pain...

"Okay...okay..." Rouge says through gritted teeth.

... but stumbles with the first step. Chavonnie catches Rogue's fall with her head... and slowly lifts her up, stabilizing her.

"Thanks bud." Rogue says as she leans on her like a crutch. They take a few steps together.

Their missing parts form a poetic silhouette as they make their way toward the door. Rogue pries it open (as she did in the opening scene), revealing a Monstrous Pyro flapping outside the door. Rogue yelps and slams the door closed. She turns to Chavonnie, alarmed.

"Chavonnie? Stay here, bud." Rogue says and pauses and cracks the door open again.

She peeks outside, her eyes widening. She allows to door to swing open, revealing the Monstrous Pyro, carrying Jean on its back.

"Come on guys, get ready! Hold on tight! Here we go!" Jeans says flying away as a class of newbie dragon riders follow her off screen on a variety of dragons, pulling back the curtain on an amazing vision in which: Vikings and dragons mill about by the dozen, basking on the rooftops, weaving along the plaza. No one seems upset, there isn't a sword in sight.

Under the framework of a massive barn, a Spyke blasts fire onto a metal brace. It steps back to let a Viking hammer it into shape. Nearby, a Blob lands, carrying a tree trunk in his mouth. He shows a Viking what he's found. The Viking pats his head. Another Viking backs a ShadowCrawler into a stall to check it for size. Rogue takes a step outside, finding Wolverine waiting for her on the step.

"I knew it. I'm dead." Rogue says thinking she was in heaven.

Wolverine laughs.

"No, but you gave it your best shot." Wolverine says as he puts his arm around Rogue, steadying her. He gestures to the transformed village.

"So? What do you think?" Wolverine asks and Rogue just shrugs, amazed.

Below, the plaza, villagers take notice.

"Hey look! It's Rogue!" Bobby calls out and they rush over, surrounding her with a hero's welcome.

"Rogue, how you doin' mate?" The real Pyro asks excited to see Rogue up and about. (It was the only way to get him to agree to make this.*Wields giant flamethrower and aims it at JOTT* Dance monkeys! Dance! *fires some fire at the fleeing couple*)

"It's great to see you up and about." Jubilee says with a giant grin.

"Turns out all we needed was a little more of..." Wolverine says sweetly before gesturing non-specifically at rogue and saying, "... this."

"You just gestured to all of me." Rogue says playing along.

"Well. Most of you." Forge says off screen.

Forge pushes through the crowd, beaming proudly.

"That bit's my handiwork. With a little Rogue flare thrown in. Think it'll do?" Forge asks referring to the prosthetic.

"I might make a few tweaks." Rogue says bittersweet but coming to terms.

Remy appears and jabs Rogue in the arm. Rogue recoils with a grumble.

"Dat's for scaring Remy." Remy says sounding really ticked off.

"What, is it always going to be this way? Cause I..." Rogue says protesting her rough treatment. (Did you just make an innuendo? _I believe I did. _Man things are getting really wacky. Must be the JOTT fumes.)

He grabs her aggressively... then kisses her. Hoots and hollers follow. (That should satisfy to ROMY fans for a while. _Indeed._)

"... could get used to it." Rogue says and if I were her I could get used to it as well. (Same. _It's the accent huh? _Oh ya. *All female members of the audience sigh in unison*)

Forge presents Rogue with a rebuilt saddle, rigging, and tail.

"Welcome home." Forge says with a big smile

Suddenly, Chavonnie pounces on the crowd, crushing several unsuspecting Vikings under her weight. (I'm not that heavy! _Yes you are. _Well nobody asked you!)

"Rebel, get down!" A Viking shouts as Chavonnie eyes the new tail excitedly, tongue wagging.

Amidst the groans and grumbles, Rogue and Remy exchange a sheepish grin. We zoom in on Rogue's prosthetic foot, snapping into the modified stirrup. The two pieces click together, forming a single shape. Astride Chavonnie, she's whole again. She rotates the pedal. The new tail opens. Bright red with a skull and Viking horns emblazoned on it. Rogue approves. We cut back to reveal... Rogue and Chavonnie, saddled up and ready to fly. Remy backs his Spyke into position.

"You ready?" Rogue asks and Chavonnie snorts an excited 'yes!'

From her mount, Rogue looks out over the changed world.

"This... is New York." Rogue voice overs. (Oh no not again! *Straps headphones back on and sighs in peaceful bliss*)

"It snows nine months of the year... and hails the other three."

They leap into the bright blue sky, together as one. Remy follows, giving chase.

"Any food that grows here is tough and tasteless. The people that grow here are even more so."

Rogue and Remy race their dragons through the village - under eaves, over rooftops, down cliff-sides, and between ship masts. It's a high energy, romantic dance of sorts.

"The only upsides are the pets. While other places have...ponies or parrots, we have..."

Their fellow recruits join them as they take to the open sky, rocketing far above the village. The Northern sky swirls with blazing, multi-coloured dragons. Rogue and Chavonnie break from the pack, spinning into the blinding sun.

"... dragons." Rogue voice overs proudly as we fade to white.

Back in the sound stage everyone is waking up still in their costumes but Rogue still has her leg thankfully. Chavonnie is standing in front of them back to normal.

"Remy just had an awful dream." Gambit says as he wakes up groggily as Chavonnie claps her hand and a party appears around them devoid of people but full of food and a first aid station.

"Wasn't a dream pretty boy. Hope you enjoyed your days as movie stars cause I gotta go. Till next time when the cast becomes reptiles and rodents and I get the last laugh. Until then I bid thee good bye." Chavonnie before disappearing leaving nothing but her smile and Pietro crushed beneath a safe.

The X-Men and Brotherhood are alarmed at her cryptic message but that vanishes the moment they see the food. They descend like a pack of wolves on the food as Chavonnie watches waiting for the right opportunity to strike and do her next parody. Let's just hope Pietro has healed by then.


End file.
